Twenty-First Century Foster Brooks

Having served his tour of duty in Iraq, warflogger Chris Hitchens returns home to consider matters domestic. Namely, "Why Women Aren't Funny":

There are more terrible female comedians than there are terrible male comedians, but there are some impressive ladies out there. Most of them, though, when you come to review the situation, are hefty or dykey or Jewish, or some combo of the three.

Perhaps Hitch should consider the possibility that straights and gentiles and ectomorphs aren't funny either. That's three more columns right there.

Hitchens then disproves his own theory (or discloses his true gender) by trying out his own comedic riff:

Is there anything less funny than hearing a woman relate a dream she's just had? ("And then Quentin was there somehow. And so were you, in a strange sort of way. And it was all so peaceful." Peaceful?)

Is this thing on?

If you want laughs, Hitch, just republish your columns glorifying the invasion of Iraq. Those killed, man!