Saturday, March 22, 2014

Another Tea Party Champ

The G.O.P. has found its ideal candidate  for California governor, especially since Robert "Mickey" Kaus is still pretending to be a Democrat:
[Glenn] Champ said the assault case "was just for picking up some underage prostitutes" and resulted in a 90-day jail sentence. He said he turned his life around after the incident.
"I found the Lord when I got arrested for picking up the prostitutes," Champ said. "I was like most people, ignorant in the darkness, in the very dark. I had no peace, had no love, had no joy. And now I do. Praise God for that…. I've grown considerably since I met Christ."
He called the voluntary manslaughter case a "tragic accident."
Ever notice how most people who find the Lord after just picking up underage prostitutes do it after they've been arrested?  The Lord must leave a card with His address on it in the back of squad cars.

This next bit of news will knock you over with a feather:
GLENN CHAMP’S political philosophy is a T.E.A. (tax enough already) partier. He believes in Biblical rights, constitution of our founding fathers state rights, liberty and Justice to use your gun rights!
From T.E.E.N. partier to T.E.A. partier.  What a short, strange trip.

Like Rush Limbaugh, Champ is a self-professed gift from God:
Q/A you may ask yourself why a man of God to be Governor of California?
God has heard your cries and sent a deliverer, “Champ”.
And God and "Champ" -- a "former G-man, welder, mechanic and contract firefighter" -- have had it with RINOs:
Feeling that it’s time to bring a fighter to the Republican Party and move away from lawyer candidates. Einstein said, “That if you keep using the same ingredients and expect different results - that is the definition of insanity” , like we have in the land of fruits and nuts.
On the other hand, the California G.O.P. knows better than the tea off the Tea Party, per the L.A. Times:
"We're not in the business of vetting candidates, and we don't pick winners and losers," [California Republican Party chairman Jim] Brulte said. "Republican voters should get to decide who runs against Jerry Brown."
So, no Brulte call is what you're saying, eh, Champ ... er ... Slugger? 

Update (11/23):  The story of Tea Party Predator Glenn Champ has not gotten much covered since your pal, Roger, broke cut-and-pasted with value added the story from the L.A. Times.  Rick Moran over at P.J. Tattler has also reported on linked to the story, but failed to inform his readers of Glenn's Tea Party bona fides.  Proving once again that your pal Roger is the only source for fearless and unbiased reporting on the internet, when he can get around it.  

Update 2 (11/23):  This will also come as no surprise.

5 comments:

Montag said...

What puzzles me about this guy is why he thinks "finding Jesus" made him smarter.

And, I find it a bit odd that he claims to have found his Savior and his lost intelligence immediately after being arrested for soliciting minors, but... his plea on voluntary manslaughter came several months after his arrest for soliciting. Maybe he was still looking for his salvation and his brains under the driver's seat when he hit and killed the pedestrian.

Dave the Slave said...

it’s time to bring a fighter to the Republican Party and move away from lawyer candidates

I can hear the campaign ads: "Most legislators take some time to get up to speed in their job, to build the necessary contacts to gain those lucrative contributions. Glenn Champ's previous experience as an actual crook will allow him to hit the ground running and get right to work screw . . . er, representing his constituents."

lea-p said...

I think you all would appreciate this little ditty about Champ, our loyal GOP pet, penned by the brilliant coozledad who comments at Nancy Nall's blog. To wit (seems like you can't link to individual comments):

“I found the Lord when I got arrested for picking up the prostitutes,” Champ said. “I was like most people, ignorant in the darkness, in the very dark. I had no peace, had no love, had no joy. And now I do. Praise God for that…. I’ve grown considerably since I met Christ.”

Champ called the voluntary manslaughter case a “tragic accident.”


"In my hour of darkness, in my time of need
Oh lord please parole me, I’ll join the GOP

"Once I was a young man
drove through a parking lot
Some guy got beneath my car
but I was not at fault
who’d have ever thought they’d think I’d manslaughtered him
Or try and get my old pink self some barely legal quim.

"in my hour of darkness, in my time of need
Oh lord please parole me, I’ll join the GOP

"A similar young man would strum his
pecker at a bar
in front of people everywhere
Reince Priebus said “A STAR!”
but he was just a country boy
Whose crimes would not confess
And what he would call “petting” most folks would call incest
in my hour of darkness, in my time of need
Oh lord please parole me, I’ll join the GOP

"then there was an old man, in robes upon a bench
and he read a riot act at me, and threw a monkey wrench

"and one day I’ll be governor
and I will be his boss
and me and my sweet Jesus will nail him to a cross

"in my hour of darkness, in my time of need
Oh lord please parole me, I’ll join the GOP."

Davis said...

Yet, his website (yes, I went there) says that he dropped out of college because of its non-biblical curriculum. At least I think that's what it said; it reads like a poor translation of an owners manual from the original Chinese.

Buttermilk Sky said...

California, the home of Darrell Arson -- I mean Issa? He'll do very well.