Friday, February 27, 2009

From Work to Wingnut Welfare

Debra Saunders is panicked that she may soon have to look for honest work. She wails:

Bloggers and e-mailers are crowing. If The Chronicle is shuttered, they'll be dancing a jig.

Many conservatives feel a warm glow at the possible demise of an institution that they believe to be failing because of liberal bias. On the far left, that same glow will satisfy those who think newspapers are not liberal enough.

The problem for Saunders is that the wingnuts who think the Chronic is a liberal rag think she's too liberal as well. (They know that the fact that Saunders' column appeared right next to a V.D. Hansen essay is just a trick to hide the paper's lefty agenda!)

If you lose the Chronic gig, Deb, you're out of luck. The right-wing media can find thousands of folks who are more red-eyed and spittle-flecked (and on the teevee, more telegenic) than you are. You could drop a nuclear bomb on the D.C. Omni Shoreham this weekend, and there'd still be plenty of cockroaches to beat you out of a job. Sure, you've smeared Al Gore in the past, but today's wingnut needs a steady diet of Obama is a communist-Muslim-alien-Negro and come to Jesus-or else, and you're no longer up to the task.

But don't worry. I'm sure Michael Savage needs someone to clip his lawn and his toenails. You won't even have to relocate.

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