Republican funnyman Mickey Kaus argues for the cover-up of the visual evidence of prisoner abuses with the following rationale:

"I wouldn't print the identities of CIA agents."

Oh really?

Let's see.

Why look:

"Is it an accident the Bush administration held a press conference announcing a ban on ephedra on the same day the Justice Department announced Attorney General Ashcroft's recusal in the Plame case--so that the coverage the former heavily diluted coverage of the latter? I think not! ... I deny I'm being paranoid here, or if I am it's what General Motors' marketers might call 'acceptable paranoia.' After all, the administration apparently controlled the timing of both press conferences--they'd be sort of crazy not to think about countering a vote-losing story (Plame) with a story that makes them look good, no?"

And this:

"Where is Mrs. [sic] Plame? Here she is!"

So Kaus would print the names of CIA agents, at least if someone printed them first. And then he'd just snigger about it, like it was all a fucking joke.

Kaus also says he wouldn't "wouldn't print private information (e.g. outing someone as gay, or twisted), even if it were relevant to a non-private story, if it would cause them to commit suicide." So Kaus is both highly moral and psychic -- in the fantasy world where he is also a journalist.

Update (5/13): For what it's worth, Kaus uses the word "identities" instead of "names," so I've corrected the quote above. There's no substantive difference, but I want to be accurate.