Rod Dreher Will Be Handling Snakes By The End of The Week. And It Won't Be A Euphemism This Time

Bad news for the Rodbotherer:

One of the strongest factors underlying views of same-sex marriage is religion, and the sense that homosexuality is in conflict with one’s religious beliefs. White evangelical Protestants stand out for their deep opposition to same-sex marriage: Just 27% favor allowing gays and lesbians to marry, while 70% oppose it (43% strongly oppose); by contrast, majorities of both Catholics (56%) and white mainline Protestants (62%) support same-sex marriage, along with an overwhelming majority (85%) of the religiously unaffiliated.

Rod's already practicing stigmata. 

Cobb Gobblers

Over at the racist New York Post, failed movie critic Kyle Smith proves that Ty Cobb was "framed" of the charge of racism:

In 1908, among many other brawls Cobb participated in, he ignored an order from a black man laying asphalt in Detroit to stop walking, then after the two argued, Cobb started a vicious fistfight and was overheard to use the N-word against the road paver.

The Georgia Peach was framed - framed, I tell ya!

Let Kyle explain:

Today that behavior would certainly brand you as a racist, but racial slurs were commonplace then, even published in the papers.

Even published in the papers then?  You're far too modest, Kyle.

Not wanting to oversell his ironclad defense of the Peach, Kyle graciously omitted the facts that rap lyrics contain the N-word and that Bob Byrd was in the Klan.

Piyushback

Piyush "Bobby" Jindal is using his official goobernutorial website like he's using every other perk of his office -- to run for President. Here, he takes on Randal "Ronsson" Paul:

Gov. Jindal: Senator Paul Unsuited to Be Commander-in-Chief

Today, Governor Jindal released the following statement after Senator Rand Paul commented this morning that ISIS exists because of hawkish foreign policy.

Governor Jindal said, "This is a perfect example of why Senator Paul is unsuited to be Commander-in-Chief. We have men and women in the military who are in the field trying to fight ISIS right now, and Senator Paul is taking the weakest, most liberal Democrat position.

It's one thing for Senator Paul to take an outlandish position as a Senator at Washington cocktail parties, but being Commander-in-Chief is an entirely different job. We should all be clear that evil and Radical Islam are at fault for the rise of ISIS, and people like President Obama and Hillary Clinton exacerbate it.

The "Washington cocktail parties" jab is a particularly nice, flop-sweaty touch. Jindal has even less of a chance at the G.O.P. nomination than Paul, albeit for the wrong reasons, and his latest appeal to cretins isn't going to increase his chances any.

This Just In: Mark Mayfield's Family Plans Lawsuit For Eleventh Straight Month

And oldie but a goodie:  Wingnut abets invasion of privacy, feels remorse about getting caught, kills himself; wingnut's survivors plan lawsuit.

Still no lawsuit.

Dulce et Decorum est

Bent double, like old beggars under sacks,
Knock-kneed, coughing like hags, we cursed through sludge,
Till on the haunting flares we turned our backs
And towards our distant rest began to trudge.
Men marched asleep. Many had lost their boots
But limped on, blood-shod. All went lame; all blind;
Drunk with fatigue; deaf even to the hoots
Of tired, outstripped Five-Nines that dropped behind.
Gas! Gas! Quick, boys! – An ecstasy of fumbling,
Fitting the clumsy helmets just in time;
But someone still was yelling out and stumbling,
And flound'ring like a man in fire or lime . . .
Dim, through the misty panes and thick green light,
As under a green sea, I saw him drowning.
In all my dreams, before my helpless sight,
He plunges at me, guttering, choking, drowning.
If in some smothering dreams you too could pace
Behind the wagon that we flung him in,
And watch the white eyes writhing in his face,
His hanging face, like a devil's sick of sin;
If you could hear, at every jolt, the blood
Come gargling from the froth-corrupted lungs,
Obscene as cancer, bitter as the cud
Of vile, incurable sores on innocent tongues,
My friend, you would not tell with such high zest
To children ardent for some desperate glory,
The old Lie; Dulce et Decorum est
Pro patria mori.

We're Only In It For The Money

The New York Times reports that John Scalzi has made a $3.4 million deal for his next thirteen books, while the guy who writes the "Diary of A Wimpy Kid" books earned $20 million last year.

Clearly I should have gone into publishing.

The Ends of the Natural Family

Truly I say unto you, before this night is over, Rod Dreher will deny Josh Duggar three times.

Rod and his pal Owen apparently believe that Josh Duggar is a victim of something, and want "to kick those who profited out of making this kid and his siblings into celebrities — starting with the Duggar parents." But the known abuse started well before the family were celebrities -- .or at least when their only celebrity was based on the father's status as a Republican state representative -- and when the children were homeschooled and their access to the corrupting media was controlled by the parents. In other words, the molestation started when the rapist not in any way famous and his worldview was the product of cultural influences (and only those influences) acceptable to Rod.

Rod may deny running "in the circles in which [Josh Duggar] is a star," but when he perceives danger to or doubt about his bigoted worldview, he screams and shouts exactly like Josh.

Sodom and Begorrah

Screamin' John Hawkins thinks they're stealing more than his Lucky Charms on the Emerald Isle.

From everything I’ve read going on in Ireland a lot of Irish politicians, those in a position of power were for same sex marriage. (sic) I doubt very highly this vote was as a result of Irish voters deciding out of the goodness of their hearts to be in favor of changing their constitution to allow same sex marriage.

I strongly assert an atmosphere of intimidation exists in Ireland to “get your mind right” on this issue if one wants to stay employed. People have lost their jobs in other countries in Europe for not supporting same sex marriage. That doesn’t sound like freedom of choice to me.

If you're looking for some confirmation of Hawkins' thesis, don't bother checking his blog, because he doesn't provide any. (No link to the gobshite.)

Apparently the 38 percent who voted "Nae" in today's election were on the dole, or independently wealthy, or self-employed, or just refused to drink the Shamrock Shake.  

Of course, since they have the secret ballot in Ireland, if the vote hadn't gone gay, everyone would have been out of a job on Monday.  Either that, or John Hawkins is just a twat.

Let He Who Has Not Slaughtered Dogs Cast The First Stone

Ted Nugent's wingman, Mike Huckabee, is now courting the right-wing pedophile vote:

Those who have enjoyed revealing this long ago sins [sic] in order to discredit the Duggar family have actually revealed their own insensitive bloodthirst, for there was no consideration of the fact that the victims wanted this to be left in the past and ultimately a judge had the information on file destroyed—not to protect Josh, but the innocent victims.

Really, Huckleberry?  You've spoken to the victims about this?  

I have no doubt that the rapist wanted this hushed up, and that the victims didn't want to be raped (a word Huckleberry never uses) in the first instance, but Huckleberry never provides any evidence of what the victims actually want.  

(The concept of a judge ordering public record of a crime "destroyed" is also troubling, assuming Huckleberry knows what the fuck he's talking about.) 

More importantly, what about people who may not want their children in the vicinity of a rapist?  Do we keep them in the dark too, as the rapist's family did, just because the rapist assures us he's been forgiven?

This is even worse:

No one needs to defend Josh’s actions as a teenager, but the fact that he confessed his sins to those he harmed, sought help, and has gone forward to live a responsible and circumspect life as an adult is testament to his family’s authenticity and humility.

The rapist "confessed his sins to those he harmed?"  Presumably, those he harmed already knew his "sins" as soon as they were raped by him.  The rapist calling his rapes "sin" doesn't change a thing.

Duggar's victims were victimized by Duggar, and no one else.  If Duggar and Huckabee believe they're the victims of bloodthirsty critics, they need to take a long look in the mirror, break the mirror with a rock and then find some productive use for the resulting shards of broken glass.

Teddy and the Cruzers

Wingnuts are bent out of shape by the fact that one of their own, Mark "Drudge rocks my cock" Halperin, asked Rafael "Ted" "El Castor" Cruz to speak a few words in Spanish.

That's just not right.

He should've asked Ted to speak in tongues.

Chris Christie Denies Jesus Three Times

Big Pussy exits the Republican primary race: 

Global warming came up on Thursday, at the Cheshire County Republicans Lincoln Day dinner. There, the New Jersey governor took a strong stand on climate change that sets him apart from the other Republicans running or thinking of running for president. He said, "I think global warming is real. I don't think that's deniable. And I do think human activity contributes to it."

The RNC will throw Big P under the bus as soon as they can find one large enough to accommodate him.

Happy Mother's Day From Your Loving Son, Roger

Douche Diligence

Caught retelling lies about Sen. Harry Reid (D-NV), Time magazine Blogger of the Year John "Asshole" Hinderaker pleads willful ignorance:

Obviously if I had known this guy was a liar I would not have given him the forum to tell a story.

Hinderaker is an attorney. And his defense -- seriously -- for repeating lies is that he didn't have any reason to think the lies weren't true.  As in, "some guy I don't called me up and told me something which I "verified" by Googling the guy's fake name and talking to him on the phone some more, so why wouldn't I believe him? And I didn't say he was telling the truth, because who reads my sorry ass for that shit?"

Time for another blogger ethics panel.

Okay

"Inspector of the Dead," by David Morrell:

The year is 1855. The Crimean War is raging. The incompetence of British commanders causes the fall of the English government. The Empire teeters.

Amid this crisis comes opium-eater Thomas De Quincey, one of the most notorious and brilliant personalities of Victorian England. Along with his irrepressible daughter, Emily, and their Scotland Yard companions, Ryan and Becker, De Quincey finds himself confronted by an adversary who threatens the heart of the nation.

This killer targets members of the upper echelons of British society, leaving with each corpse the name of someone who previously attempted to kill Queen Victoria. The evidence indicates that the ultimate victim will be Victoria herself. As De Quincey and Emily race to protect the queen, they uncover long-buried secrets and the heartbreaking past of a man whose lust for revenge has destroyed his soul.

From the author of "William S. Boroughs, Lawrence, Kansas Private Dick."

MoDo Is Insipid, But Douthat Is Insidious

Ross Douthat becomes more loathsome by the day.

In his latest column, he argues that raped children (whom he refers to as "women") were privileged in respect to their rapists.  And that, therefore, privilege doesn't exist. But U.S. gays are extraordinarily privileged.

Reliable Soreasses

A couple of days ago, Dyldo Byers at PolitcHo was pimping his stable of right-wing hacks to replace Bob Schieffer as host of Face the Nation:

Network President David Rhodes is a long way from settling on a successor.,,,

But there is a shortlist, those sources said: Internally, Rhodes and his fellow executives are looking at Major Garrett, the network's chief White House correspondent, and Norah O'Donnell, the co-anchor of "CBS This Morning" and substitute host for Schieffer on "Face." One source also said that John Dickerson, the network's political director, is on the list of potential replacements.

But CBS brass are considering outside talent as well: Jake Tapper, the CNN host who previously substituted for George Stephanopoulos on ABC's Sunday show "This Week," is a top consideration. ABC News chief White House correspondent Jonathan Karl is also under consideration. However, both men are believed to be under contract with their respective employers.

Approximately 72 hours later, Schieffer announced John Dickerson as his replacement. (I'm guessing the decision wasn't made over the weekend, and was probably done by the time Schieffer made his retirement public.) But the sources inside Dyldo's head had already tapped a wingnut for the vacancy.

I also enjoyed the "believed to be under contract with their respective employers." Can't be arsed to nail that one down, Dyldo? Do you believe Tappy and Jonny are independent contractors?

Swing and a Miss

All in all, the rollout of Ron Paul's victim of the media strategy didn't go as well as Scott Walker's.

When he announces, Marco Rubio's really going to have to step up his game to be half the media victim that Walker is. 

Grand Old Police Blotter: More On Todd's Family Values Edition

Sharper than a serpent's tooth and crazier than a nut hatch is former Executive Director of the South Carolina G.O.P., Todd Kincannon, if Todd's father is to be believed:

Just before midnight on April 13, 2013, according to one incident report, an officer with the Simpsonville Police Department responded to a call from Kincannon's father, who said he wished to report an incident but did not want to press charges. The father (whose name has been redacted from the report) said that he had been woken up at 11:55 p.m. by his dogs barking because Kincannon was banging on the front door. Kincannon reportedly said that he had spilled Coca-Cola on his hands and needed to wash them. When the father followed him into the kitchen, Kincannon allegedly pulled a out a revolver, pointed it at his father, and screamed, "Get back, motherfucker, or I'll kill you." 

The father said that he tried to retreat, but his son pushed him against the front door twice and said, "Now I'm going to kill you, motherfucker." The father ran shoeless to another house and said that "he could see the red laser sight from Todd's handgun bouncing around as he was running," according to the report. 

Speaking to police, Kincannon's father said he and his wife had given Kincannon "large amounts of money in the recent past (including $35,000) to help Todd pay off student loans and to help him catch up on payments to the rental house" and that tension had arisen recently over inheritance issues after a family member passed away. An officer wrote at the time, "He advised that he's seen the weapon plenty of times in the past, especially when Todd put his own gun to his head and threatened to kill himself." Kincannon's father also said there was "a lengthy history of Todd verbally and physically abusing he and his wife."

Todd makes Erick Erickson look sane.

Law-Abiding American for Rand

For those dimwitted enough to believe that Poodle Paul's position against recording the telephone calls of "law-abiding Americans" represents some sort of libertarian vestigial tail, suck(*) on this:

“I have never argued against any technology being used against having an imminent threat, [or] an act of crime going on,” Paul said, referring to Boston Marathon bombing suspect Dzhokhar Tsarnaev. “If someone comes out of a liquor store with a weapon and 50 dollars in cash I don’t care if a drone kills him or a policeman kills him.”

If you smoke weed, Pot Paul has a wiretap for you.  If he had his druthers, Big Brother would be recording every homosexualist, abortion provider and political "radical" in the land. And worse.

The Poodle is a social Darwinist, to be sure, but he doesn't give two shits about your privacy if you're not one of the people who would subscribe to his old man's newsletter or build a child molesting religious compound in Waco.

*  "Suck on this" is a registered trademark of Tom "Fellatio" Friedman.

Jew for Rand

Said no one, ever.