Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Republican Family Values: Sweatin' to the Odies Edition

When is it proper for one wingnut to dump a wingnut spouse for a third wingnut? When wingnut one is a dude and the other two wingnuts are women.

Even though it's not yet legal in California, gay marriage has destroyed another happy home.

Douchebag D'Souza has driven old Dixie down to the used wingnut lot, and traded her in for a much younger model named after Garfield's dog.

Ms. Odie Joseph is a self-proclaimed fan of "put a ring on it." Douche, take my advice and get a pre-nup.

Apparently Douche was looking for someone more his daughter's age:

[Douchesouza] met his blond, Protestant wife, Dixie, in 1988, when he was a senior domestic-policy analyst at the Reagan White House. She was a researcher for the Republican Party. They live in a north Virginia suburb with their 9-month- old daughter, Danielle.

Dixie D'Souza, who was born in Louisiana and raised in Southern California, calls her husband "a wonderful father . . . very much a hands-on dad . . . always there doing his duty, doing the diaper changes."

When she calls his small office at the American Enterprise Institute, where D'Souza is a research fellow, the writer stops everything, answering the phone with an Ozzie Nelsonish "Hello, Huneeeeeeee."

And soooooooo long, sucker!

The future ex-Mrs. D'Souza is prone to deep thoughts such as the following, which will have John Bolton and the Podhoretzes sending their RSVP regrets:

And to Israel and Iran, I’m sending you this message. This conservative American loves you and is so proud of you. I love the simple words you are using to convey your undeniable humanity. I don’t want my country to ever bomb your countries and I don’t want for you ever to bomb each other. Israeli and Iranian cultures are ancient, rich, and complimentary. Your lands are historic, your people beautiful, brilliant, and deeply spiritual. Finally, from the bottom of my heart, thank you Mr. Edry, for the encouragement you’ve unknowingly provided me!

She's also a Randian, or at least she likes posing with terrible literature.

Sadly, Odie Joseph's blog is undergoing maintenance.

4 comments:

Rob Patterson said...

You can read Ms. Joseph's thoughts on the scourge of divorce (from just earlier this year!) here.

Roger said...

Thoughts?

I couldn't make it through that mess.

Glennis said...

She's also a Randian, or at least she likes posing with terrible literature.

A Randian posing with terrible literature and a big ole rhinestone cross around her neck.

Cognitive dissonance much?

-blessed holy socks, the non-perishable-zealot said...

Nevertheless, you shall croak someday, somewhere, at sometime... then, our indelible souls fly-up to meet our Maker, k? Jesus decides whetha we should enter in based on our finite existence. And you ain't going Up if you don't stop this crazy worshipping of the whorizontal, puppet BO, like he's your tiny god. Think. Know. Grow-up. I know you have some brain matter somewhere inside... IF not, read my 16 blogs. that'll stupefy you. God bless you with discernment.