Friday, November 17, 2006

Battlestar's On, Just Leave Me Alone And Write Twenty Pages Comparing Howard Dean to Mussolini

The Pantload is finally about to commence work on his first coloring book, I Heart Hitler:

Help Wanted [Jonah Goldberg]

I'm gonna need a meticulous, smart, diligent intern/assistant type to help me with the house-cleaning on my manuscript. In particular, I need someone to help get my copious footnotes and the like in order. There will also be some serious research-related stuff to do as we head into galley mode. It would be best if he or she -- or conceivably it -- went to school or worked in the DC area so we could meet from time to time. I haven't thought through the money question, but you can be assured it won't be lavish. But what's filthy lucre compared to a glowing mention in the acknowledgements and my eternal gratitude? Anyway, anybody interested in said gig should send an email with appropriate info (resume, experience, dancing ability etc) to
Translation: Is there anyone who can substantiate any of the shit I made up and read my handwriting? I already spent the advance on Ring Dings and Dexatrim, and if I miss my publisher's deadline again even Judith Regan won't do business with me.

I'm not kidding. The expected publication date of I Heart Hitler has been pushed back from March 20, 2007 to September 11, 2007. (An aniversary tie-in. How tasteful.) The Pantload's publisher was already pimping the slender tome as an all-but-finished product 13 months ago, in October 2005. Most of the folks who pre-ordered this pile have died of old age or stupidity by now.

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