Saturday, April 03, 2004

Wingnuts Without Irony

World O'Crap has unearthed a motherlode of wingnuttery: Alan Keyes' Renew America website. The worst of the worst right-wing columnists (or, more accurately, wannabe columnists) can be found there.

The wingnut without irony in the title of this post in one Kaye Grogan, who proposes the following legislation:

There needs to be a law passed where any person who disrespects the "Office of the Presidency" by making false accusations and spreading deliberate rumors about the president, should be charged with a felony or at the very least a high misdemeanor.

Hey, make it an ex post facto law -- as long as we're fucking with the Constitution -- and I'll sign on.

And here's another of Alan's Renewed Americans Isaiah Z. Sterrett:

I guess you can't expect much maturity from the party of Lyndon Johnson, who revealed his surgical scars to reporters, or Bill Clinton, who revealed his, well, Johnson, to half the girls between Little Rock and D.C. Still, you'd think being at war would evoke some seriousness in Democrats.

Hey, wait. President Clinton didn't reveal his Johnson to half the girls between Little Rock and D.C. -- that's a false accusation and a deliberate rumor. It's off to prison for you, Isaiah. We'll try to get you an upper bunk in Mark Levin's cell.

Isaiah says says he can prove that Dick Clarke's a big nobody:

"Clarke wasn't important enough to appear in the index of Sean Hannity's first bestseller, Let Freedom Ring; Ann Coulter's second bestseller, Treason; Bob Woodward's 2002 book Bush At War; or Bill Sammon's 2002 Fighting Back: The War on Terrorism from Inside the Bush White House. Dick Cheney told Time Magazine, 'I don't know the guy that well.'"
I guess that proves it: If you're not in the index of some wingnut's book, your 30 years of public service don't mean a thing.

Hmm... turns out Isaiah is only only 15. So we'll have to stick him in juvie with Kyle Williams.

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