Roger's Bad Taste Corner

Jesse Taylor at Pandagon.net links to a Republican National Convention contest in which Republicans aged 18-24 years are supposed to "Stand Up And Holla!" by composing a short essay which "answers this question (sic): Why is the President's call to community service important and how have you demonstrated it?"

Channelling the types of Young (and old) Republicans who are prominent on the 'net and elsewhere, I've come up with this:

My Community Service, by a Hipublican

I'm gonna holla!

I'm a GOP-baller!

I'ma bitch-smack anyone prayin' to Allah!

Dead fuckin' meat all over Ramallah!*

N' fuck them losers livin' in squalor!

Rudy shoot their asses with a service revolva!

Keep 'em outta sight, build the wall taller!

But service is my right when my crime is white collar!

I'm Karl Rove Jnr., right down to the pallor!

Like Ken Mehlman's dick, nobody's smaller!

* No military service offered or implied by this sentiment.