Friday, January 25, 2008

G.E. -- We Bring Good Things To Mitt

Willard "Muff" Romney was handed an expensive gift by weapons contractor General Electric last evening. During the Republican debate on MSNBC, Tim Russert favored Muffy with the mother of all softballs, "How much do you hate the Clintons?" (aka "Are you prepared to run against both Bill Clinton and Hillary Clinton?") Muffy, of course, gave the teeball a mighty whack and managed a solid single. The other candidates were left to cram their Clinton-bashing in answer to questions not concerning the loathsome couple.

But G.E.'s gift kept on giving. After the debate, Chris Matthews breathlessly declared Muffy's answer the unquestioned highlight of the debate. In a post-debate debriefing, Matthews asked Pumpkinhead about Muff's glorious "moment." Russert at first pretended not to understand which question-and-answer Matthews referred to, but then admitted, in a fit of laughter, that he was well aware Matthews meant Muff's Clinton-bashing response, and was only teasing the aged lech. This morning, MSNBC continues to feature Muffy's brilliant reply -- Deliverance Joe Scarbrough also considered the vacuous response a defining moment -- along with Pumpkinhead's gotcha question to McCain, the one which showed that McCain likely doesn't remember where he hid his Easter eggs.

So the G.E. Primary has ended, and Muff's their man. As the MSNBC all-Republican front continually crowed last night, all of the Floridian NBC affiliates save one carried the debate live, which was the least they could do considering all the advertising cash Muff's handed them. And that's varmint-feed compared to the payoff the G.E. gang will earn on munitions and medical appliances when Muff extends the occupation of Iraq another four years.

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