Thursday, July 31, 2003

Asses In America

Michelle Malkin, the beardless, non-artery-clogged L. Brent Bozell for the new millenium, sniffs out the ass-crack baring phenomenon that all the kids are wild for.

On the right, asses should be heard and not seen.


Los Angeles Magazine's puffer on Little Bobby Kaus is online. There's just so much that's so wrong about this piece. I guess when a writer characterizes Kaus as a "liberal iconoclast," and starts out "WHAT'S UP WITH SNARKY? That only sounds like a new teen movie," you know you're getting a blowfile and not a serious examination of Kaus's dubious claim that he's left of his pal Lucianne. To be fair, if you ever wondered what Mini-Mick looks like in purple lipstick, this is the article for you.

Neither A Writer Norah Scholar

Jim Capozzola's sorely outmatched nemesis, Norah Vincent, is the latest wingnut to take a swing at Ann Coulter.

"Nothing could encapsulate more perfectly the mood of the country than the string of hellfire polemics that have been selling at an alarming rate � the worst of them being Michael Moore's 'Stupid White Men' and Ann Coulter's new 'Treason.' They are mirror images of each other, representing the hyperbolic far left and the hysterical far right, respectively. Coulter's book is so extreme it's kicking up a rumpus even among my fellow right-of-center commentators, who have condemned it as dangerous, a historical [sic] nonsense."

It's not clear Vincent's actually read the book. She merely cites criticism of it by the likes of Sully and Crazy Davey, and gives no concrete examples of Treason's craptitude. If the self-righteous brothers hate it, that's good enough for her. At least she's willing to go out on a limb and say that not all liberals are anti-American traitors. That's mighty right of you, Nor.

Actually, the best part of Norah's column is this correction, published today alongside Norah's column in the three-dimensional version of the Times, but well-hidden online:

Ratification � In a July 17 Norah Vincent column, it was incorrectly stated that amending the U.S. Constitution requires a vote of two-thirds of the states for ratification. In fact, three-fourths of the states must ratify proposed amendments.

"It was incorrectly stated." Hey, how the hell did that get in my column!?! I demand an investigation!

Maybe Norah's beef with Ann is really just a friendly rivalry between equally qualified constitutional scholars.

Hey, Poindexter, Don't Let The Giant Eyeball Hit You In The Ass On The Way Out!

Good news. Johnny "Fresh Meat" Poindexter is an unemployed co-conspirator once again.

"While Defense Secretary Donald H. Rumsfeld did not personally dismiss Admiral Poindexter, the defense official said, Mr. Rumsfeld agreed that the admiral's credibility was shot and it was time for him to go."

Am I having a flashback? Poindy's credibility was shot long before the first time Dubya quit drinking.

Tuesday, July 29, 2003

Snooze You Can Lose

Imagine the worst of NPR and the worst of Slate that's not Mickey Kaus. That's Day to Day. Wedding budgets ... Cell phones ... Alex Chadwick in a Los Angeles park ... Rewarmed Slate tripe about phone psychics. Mush ... drivel ... pablum ... You'll almost miss Talk of the Nation.

Those enjoying the foregoing Salon article (in the previous post) might enjoy this photo of the affable Chris Sibeni. The sub-literate quality of the related website will clear up any mystery as to why NYU thought Mr. Sibeni an unqualified candidate.

Update: Missing link to the missing link restored.

Tom "Bug Chaser" DeLay thinks he saw a flying monkey:

To gauge how "out of touch" the Democrats are, DeLay instructed, "close your eyes and try to imagine Ted Kennedy landing that Navy jet." The crowd chuckled obligingly.

Now try to imagine Bush landing it. Now imagine the resulting carnage.

The All-Time Stratego Champion Writes Again

The last semi-literate screed from unemployed phone repairman and Barc-O-Lounger Bismark Steven den Beste was so popular that Wall Street Journal Online has given denny B. another shot.

Some of my favorite pearls of wisdom from the Krispy-Kreme Clausewitz.

Steven goes out on a limb:

There's another year and a half in Mr. Bush's current term, and by the end of it, the process will either be a complete shambles or else it will clearly be on the road to success, and I think it's unlikely to be a shambles.
On what "many in Europe said" going into World War II:
Going into World War II, many in Europe said that Americans used to be willing to fight back in the days of Lincoln but had become decadent and soft. History proves otherwise, of course.

On the historic day in 1995 when American forces withdrew from the occupied territories:

We stuck with the occupations of Germany and Japan for 50 years. I feel confident we'll stick with this, too.

On Steven's need for a laxative:

As combat started, I felt enormous pressure and worry, for the people involved. But on another level I felt a great deal of relief. Once we actually began the invasion, certain political issues became faits accomplis.
On having to videotape Dragonball Z during the early stages of the war:
But when the issues are sufficiently important to us, we'll still make major sacrifices.

On Steven's humble origins:

Mistakes will get made...

(Link via Joe C.)

George H.W. Bush, Family Man

Like father, like son. According to Sharon Bush, Neil "Bangkok John" Bush has learned a thing or two from his dad's time with the Company:

"[Sharon Bush] wonders whether Neil, 48, was unfaithful to her throughout their marriage as he has admitted he was at the end. She wonders whether Neil is the father of the baby born to Maria Andrews, the 40-year-old Houston woman he is dating. Sharon wonders why he used e-mail to tell her he was leaving and why he told her by phone months later, 'You better move on with your life or you'll find yourself in a back alley.'"

A pal of Neil's denies the allegations.

But not all the of Bush men have lost interest in Sharon:

"At one point, Sharon says, she tried to talk to her former father-in-law, and he changed the subject. "He said, 'Come and see the new hot tub.'"

The Tolerance Of The G.O.P.

Darrell "Slim Jim" Issa fires a warning shot across the bow of his Republican rivals:

As for her husband, who came out of the closet after their divorce, Rep. Darrell Issa's campaign manager, Scott Taylor, took this shot in the Los Angeles Times:

"'I just have the feeling voters aren't going to embrace the first bisexual gubernatorial candidate,' Taylor said. Minutes later, Issa's communications director, Jonathan Wilcox, said Taylor's remark about Huffington had been 'reckless.'

I hope Arnold will weigh in on this particularly slimy attack.

Monday, July 28, 2003

You Dick

Did you ever want to be a political analyst but thought you had nothing intelligent to say? Don't let that stop you:

MATTHEWS: Time now for the Political Buzz.

Dick Armey is the former House majority leader and is now an MSNBC political analyst. Katrina Vanden Heuvel is editor of �The Nation.� And John Fund is with ...

Up front, today the Democratic National Committee placed a full page ad in �The New York Times,� urging citizens to sign a petition demanding an investigation into how those infamous 16 words made it into the president�s State of the Union address.

The ad reads, in part, �America took President Bush at his word, but now we find out that it wasn�t true.�


RICHARD ARMEY, FORMER HOUSE MAJORITY LEADER: Well, first of all, they�re spending a lot of dough on what I would call mighty thin gruel.

But secondly, they�ve blown their cover. They�ve just put an ad in �The New York Times� and said this is all about politics now. It�s all about campaigns. And this is our motive, this is our interest, this is our desire.

Can you imagine standing there two blocks away from Ground Zero in New York City and reading that ad, how impressed you�re going to be with the Democrat Party? (Emphasis added.)

Armey isn't that stupid. He just thinks you are.

The flag that can never be desecrated enough.

My sentiments exactly.

He'll Be Back

"Arnold spent the weekend continuing his due diligence regarding a possible run. He has made no decision at this time. He will continue to weigh the pros and cons with his family and will continue to seek the counsel of supporters and colleagues." -- Reuters, July 28

Yes, the former dope-smoking, muscle-headed Austrian is consulting with his freakish, misshapen-headed wife and... uh ... do they have any children ... it seems like a physical impossibility ... as part of his due diligence. Arnold wouldn't know what due diligence was if someone injected it into him between his toes.

Sunday, July 27, 2003

An Up and Coming Hack

Speaking of Bugs Malkin, she's really hit her stride as an irrational hack.

In her July 18th column (which seems a whole lot like this Reason column of almost one year ago), Malkin bashes the New York Times Corporation for purchasing land obtained by New York State under the state's power of eminent domain. But if the owners of the property did not receive just compensation for the property seized, it's the State of New York and not the the Times Corporation she should be bashing. The Times Corp. can't condemn or seize anything, nor can it set the compensation paid to the original owners.

And Malkin barely mentions the City of Arlington's use of eminent domain to give Bush Jnr and his pals land for the Texas Rangers' stadium (and extra land to resell). In fact, she only mentions that deal to bash the NYT for a running a Kristof column condemning it.

Either both Geo. Bush and the Times Corp. are "evil," "greedy leech[es]" "conspir[ing]" to commit "legalized theft" and screw private landowners for personal gain, or neither one is. But you can't have it both ways, Malkin.

And, in another promising bit of hackery, Malkin blasts the Secret Service for seeking to question wing-nut cartoonist Michael Ramirez, who drew a panel featuring a character pointing a gun to Bush's head. After all, Malkin says, it's not like Mikey "was some left-wing homeless crackpot who had sent President Bush an anthrax-laced death threat." In Malkin's vacant skull, the only death threats worth investigating are those from "left-wing ... crackpots." I guess that's because left-wingers are so smart that even the homeless, mentally-ill ones are capable of manufacturing anthrax from the baskets of their shopping carts.

W--gn-t H--k

From Michelle Malkin's latest column in "Capitalism Magazine":


You'll never get Vanna's job, Michelle, unless you learn the rules of the game.

Dog Bites Newspaper

Dirty Dick Morris on the New York Times:

"I think many Americans must share my feelings today: To see it fall into the hands of propagandists, after so many years of dignity and balance, is like watching your father get drunk."

Or maybe like watching your father spend thousands of dollars to lick the toejam from a prostitute's feet and be made to bark like a dog.

Department of Corrections

There was a time when the New York Times could get away with its conservative lies and distortions. Thanks to Roger Ailes, that time has passed:

"An article last Sunday about the author Ann Coulter and her emergence as a major conservative voice in television, radio and newspaper interviews misstated her age. She is 41, not 39."


Saturday, July 26, 2003

Go Read Jesse Taylor

You can thank me later.

Same Card, Different Dick Deck

Hey, that scumbag messiah of wing-nut media is claiming to be the Ten of Diamonds. I am the one and only Ten of Diamonds in the wing-nut deck, you tax-cheating foreign wack-job!

Get your own fucking card, you wannabe loser!

(Thanks to mw.)

The Creepiest Place On Earth

Those who criticize the Disney Corp. for holding Gay Days at its facilities might want to worry a little more about the heterosexuals who frequent the parks. Witness the fractured fairy tale one Dick Baker, "King" of the Community Christian School in Largo, Florida.

The middle school-age girls told police they had been to Disney with Baker 20 times, 30 or 40 times. One girl said she had been 81 times. Sometimes they shared a room with him, but not a bed. Sometimes Baker, 52, was the only adult on the trip. He slept in Disney pajamas, one girl said.

There was no need to bring a swimsuit - Baker had a bag full of Disney suits that the girls could choose from so everyone would match. Detectives learned that he gave them matching dresses and took pictures of them wearing Tinkerbell and other costumes, complete with wands and crowns.

As the article points out, Disney Dick hasn't been charged with any crime. But I doubt he'll be asked to be Grand Marshall again.

(Thanks to a reader for the tip.)

Bennett Lied, Casinos Thrived

Or, The Death of Phony Outrage

The last nail has been driven into the super-sized coffin of William J. Bennett, and the dirt has been tamped down. Not even Bennett's pal Pumpkinhead Russert can resurrect the public career of the two-faced blowhard.

Here's Morals Fuhrer Bennett two months ago, denying large gambling losses:

"Over 10 years, I'd say I've come out pretty close to even."

And here's Bennett now:

"...William Bennett rejects reports that he lost $8 million at casinos over 10 years but acknowledged it was 'a lot of money.' ....

'It was a high level, was a lot of money," he said, and "counting up, has made a difference in our lives.'"

Don't worry, Bill. We never believed you anyway.

But while Bennett has given up gambling, he hasn't given up lying. Says Bill:

"'I'm not a hypocrite,' he said. 'I never got on the soapbox about gambling.'"

Oh, but you are hypocrite, big man.

"Our Founding Fathers understood that America would flourish when its citizens cherished certain ideals. Love of liberty and equality. Attention to the formation of good character. Respect for honesty. Faith. Pride in good work. These are principles that make America great."

"Though all children need to learn some of the same things (the importance of friendship or honesty, for instance), the fact remains that all children are different."

"Every social activity, every human enterprise requiring people to act in concert, is impeded when people aren't honest with one another."

"He has contempt for the truth and for the meaning of words....This remark was truly a Clintonism, a term that may well enter our popular vocabulary, meaning "to tell a fantastic lie in public, accompanied by the appearance of heartfelt sincerity."

I could go on and on and on, but you get the drift. To Billy B., the only real virtue is not getting caught.

Bill will end his career in obscurity, filing Michael Savage's weekend slot on MSNBC.

The Moonie Times Catechism

This is one of the things I hate about the Moonie Times. This article about the Senate Judiciary Committee vote on the Pryor nomination is factually accurate, as far as reporting on what was said during the hearing. But the lead paragraph doesn't contain a single true syllable:

A judicial confirmation hearing yesterday turned into a rancorous debate between Democrats and Republicans over whether it's possible for a devout Catholic to be confirmed to the federal bench.

The debate was about the Republicans' smear of Democratic members as anti-Catholic. Not one Senator spoke for or against the proposition that "it's possible for a devout Catholic to be confirmed to the federal bench." As the Democrats pointed out, it was Whorrin' Hatch who brought up Pryor's religious beliefs. I have no doubt that Hatch brought up the matter in order to appeal to right-wing Catholics, and also to shield Pryor from inquiry into his radical political and legal views.

The sentence is also a lie because, as Senator Richard Durbin, points out, Pryor is a true "cafeteria Catholic." Pryor opposes Church doctrine on the death penalty, and only follows doctrine when it concurs with his political positions.

But it's up to the Catholics to excommunicate Pryor; it's the Senate's job to reject his nomination.

Thursday, July 24, 2003

Education Reform with John Lott

John Lott, Jnr says that teachers should be allowed to carry concealed guns on school property, to protect their charges from those who would do them harm. Which begs the question -- why can't the kids pack heat too?

There's no exception in the Second Amendment for the under-sixteens. Sixth-graders who want to bring weapons to school to kill their classmates won't be deterred by school rules prohibiting them from carrying guns, so why should law-abiding pupils be denied the right to defend themselves? Bullying will be a thing of the past, or at least diminish rapidly. And, without the right to even the odds, the kids will just be sitting ducks for any wackjob teacher who wants to pop a cap in their asses.

I'm sick of scholars like John Lott who interpret the Constitution as a "living document" in order to deny our most vulnerable citizens their constitutional rights.

Wednesday, July 23, 2003

The Old Cracker Barrel

Wesley Pruden, demonic spawn of racists and editor of the Moonie Times equates criticism of the Confederacy with "insult[ing] ... Southern whites"

"Then he [Kweisi Mfume] added a mocking insult of Southern whites, no longer welcome in what was only yesterday the party of (Thomas) Jefferson and (Andrew) Jackson: 'Your political capital is the equivalent of Confederate dollars.'"

Sorry, Klan-boy. The last two elected U.S. Presidents were Southern white Democrats. The only Southern whites not welcome in the Democratic party are you and your fellow racists.


So says discredited Moonie Times writer Bill Sammon, in an opinion piece the Father's rag is passing off as a straight news story:

"President Bush's upcoming meeting with the Urban League, coupled with his snubbing of more-militant black groups, mirrors his outreach to moderate Palestinians while ignoring Yasser Arafat."
Yes, I realize that last post is essentially pointless.... "here's something you should see, but unfortunately you can't see it."

But you should read Mad Kane and Felbers' links anyway.

Madeleine Begun Kane, humorist and blogger, writes that she was invited to a forum on the 2004 Presidential Election sponsored by The Week magazine. The featured guests were Sid Blumenthal and Gary Hart (and Ed Rollins and Monica Crowley). Adam Felber was also in attendance. My invitation and first-class airline ticket were, I assume, lost in the mail.

Nevertheless, I caught a few minutes of the panel on C-SPAN. It was kind of a strange set up, with Harold "Mr. Tina Evans" Brown and the four panelists sitting on stools and sort of shoved into a corner. Sid and Gary ably represented truth and justice. Unfortunately, I can't find it in C-SPAN's (very limited) archives, but it was definitely worth viewing.

Catholic Smear

Here's the wingnut Catholic crowd using its religious beliefs to smear non-Catholics, hell, anyone who disagrees with them:

The ads -- probably the toughest so far in the Senate's battle over President Bush's judicial nominations -- accuse "some in the U.S. Senate," apparently meaning Democrats, of opposing the appeals court nomination of Alabama Attorney General William H. Pryor Jr. because he is a devout Catholic.

The ads are being run by the Committee for Justice -- founded by C. Boyden Gray, a White House counsel in the administration of President George H.W. Bush, to help rally support for judicial nominees -- and the Ave Maria List, an organization of lay Catholics that works for the election of antiabortion candidates to Congress.

Apparently the wingnut Bible excludes the false witness bit.

Tuesday, July 22, 2003

Cap Weinberger: A Reassessment

Roger Ailes is a sensitive blog, and maybe it's been too hard on ol' Cappy Weinberger. After all, if he says that Saddam Hussein had "huge deposits" of WMDs, well, who would know better?

Regnery author and prolific wingnut Kenneth R. Timmerman lays out his case for Weinberger's knowledge of Saddam's arsenal:

Mr. Weinberger's ire over Pollard also had personal overtones. It was Mr. Weinberger who was the strongest promoter within the Reagan administration of the intelligence exchange between America and Iraq, which began as early as 1983, when the State Department removed Iraq from the list of terrorist nations. Besides providing the Israelis with satellite photographs of Iraqi weapons sites, Pollard says he also gave them evidence of the transfer to Iraq of U.S.-manufactured weapons -- a leak that made Mr. Weinberger furious, since he was the official who would have had to approve such a covert transfer.

Clearly, significant damage to national security was caused by the Reagan-era intelligence cooperation with Iraq. Western technology went toward improving Iraq's SCUD-B missiles that helped kill American soldiers and Israeli citizens during the war. U.S. intelligence techniques helped the Iraqis preserve strategic capabilities from Allied air strikes -- and perhaps also from United Nations inspectors, who continue to accuse Iraq of hiding stockpiles of biological agents and chemical weapons production equipment.

Could that explain why Weinberger's so interested in finding Saddam's remains?

Of course, you don't have to believe a wingnut to acknowledge the Reagan Administration's willingness to do business with Saddam, up close and personal. If anyone would know what weapons Saddam had, it would be Saddam's generous buds in the Reagan Administration.

Bork Again

Slouching weirdbeard Bobby Bork must've really wanted tix to that Mel Gibson screening.

Republican judicial martyr Robert Bork has converted to Catholicism, according to U.S. News & World Report's Paul Bedard. The foiled Supreme Court nominee, now 76 and a scholar at the American Enterprise Institute, was baptized a Catholic by a conservative priest and Opus Dei member, C. John McCloskey, at the Catholic Information Center chapel on K Street. The former Protestant's sponsors were National Review pundit Kate O'Beirne and United Press International chief John O'Sullivan. "If you get baptized at my age, all of your sins are forgiven. And that's very helpful," Bork said.

Then he flagellated himself and showed Bob Novak some racy videos of himself and the wife.

(Edited per comments.)

The reviews are in:

"Eggs-traordinary! Egg-citing!" -- Matt Drudge (Drudge Report)

"Dolphingasmic!" -- Peggy Noonan (Wall Street Journal)

"God-damned foreigners! They'll never succeed if they don't learn English!" -- Linda Chavez (federal lawbreaker)

"Why wasn't I invited? I even kissed the ass of his Hitler-loving dad! I wonder...." -- Michael Medved (Parents Televison Council)

(Via Atrios.)

(Link corrected.)

Monday, July 21, 2003

Cartooning Made Simple

Try this one on for size, Mikey:

Bush, running down a street, screaming, covered in naplam, with an aircraft labeled "Truth" flying above.

Get it?

(Link via TBogg.)

Maybe He's Canadian

Read this.

Does it bear any resemblance to this: "But the unremitting loathing of the president in the prose, the sneers at anything he might say, the contempt for him that oozes out of every sentence."

Is Sully on crack?

Box of Rocks

Word on the street is that some publication called LA Magazine has a puffer on Mickey Kaus. I've never heard of the rag, so I don't know if it specializes in plastic surgery ads or escort ads. It surely can't be a respected publication if it wastes space profiling the author of this:

Slate's annual retreat is this weekend. They are probably going to try to make us think outside the box again, when all I want to do is curl up inside the box and go to sleep. ... Inside the box is the new outside the box!

Try thinking outside your ass, Kaus.

Sunday, July 20, 2003

Lies of the Times

Well, I see Bill Keller hasn't done much to improve the accuracy of the New York Times:

"Ms. Coulter, 39...."

I can't wait to read the correction.

Cap Weinberger Proves The Existence Of Santa Claus

The pardoned Iran-Contra conspirator writes, in the Wall Street Journal:

"That we have not yet located huge deposits of weapons of mass destruction does not mean they do not or did not exist. After all, we have not yet found Saddam Hussein or his remains--but not even Democratic presidential candidates or the New York Times contend that he did not exist."

(Link via Sadly, No.)

Grand Old Police Blotter: The Ballad of Reading Crap Written in Gaol Edition

Perjurer and honorary Republican Lord Jeffrey Archer is being released from prison today, undoubtedly ready to inflict more of his shite novels on unsuspecting readers. Archer has already earned �10 million from the sale of his prison diaries, which fortunately don't contain any sex scenes. The Guardian reports:

Prisoner FF8282 has not been idle during his two years in jail. The disgraced Tory peer, author, fantasist and convicted liar also known as Jeffrey Archer has built up a fighting fund of investments stretching from a retail park in Cumbria to a luxury holiday complex in Majorca, an Observer investigation has discovered. When Archer is released from Hollesley Bay open prison in Suffolk tomorrow he will immediately tap into the �60 million fortune that has expanded in prison along with his waistline. The money will be used in the fight to clear his name, settle scores with old enemies and publicise his new favourite cause: prison reform.

Archer will make a short statement tomorrow before driving to his home in Grantchester, near Cambridge. It is likely to contain a strong expression of his commitment to prison reform following his first-hand experience. The Howard League for Penal Reform confirmed that Archer would be speaking at a conference held by the prison charity in September, if his parole conditions allow.

It appears Mary was unsuccessful in getting Lord Jeff a position in Iraq.

From "The White Man Unburdened"

The carrier was easily within helicopter range of San Diego but G.W. would not have been able to show himself in flight regalia, and so would not have been able to demonstrate how well he wore the uniform he had not honored. Jack Kennedy, a war hero, was always in civvies while he was commander in chief. So was General Eisenhower. George W. Bush, who might, if he had been entirely on his own, have made a world-class male model (since he never takes an awkward photograph), proceeded to tote the flight helmet and sport the flight suit. There he was for the photo-op looking like one more great guy among the great guys. Let us hope that our democracy will survive these nonstop foulings of the nest.

St. Andrew's Cross

Hey, Sully! Don't try that at home.

On second thought: Ah, go ahead.

Does this diminutive figure dressed up in military clothes remind you of anyone?

People aren't buying him either.

Thursday, July 17, 2003

Pryor, Pryor, Pants on Fire

In his testimony before the committee on June 11 and in written answers to later questions, Mr. Pryor said he saw nothing wrong in raising money for a Republican attorneys general group. He also said he was unaware that any of the companies he solicited did business in Alabama and would therefore come under his jurisdiction as the state's chief law enforcement official.

But the documents cited by Democrats on the panel appear to show that Mr. Pryor had solicited donations from several companies that do business in Alabama, including the International Paper Corporation and the United States Steel Corporation.

Mr. Pryor also said he was unaware that any tobacco companies had been solicited by the Republican attorneys general group. The documents suggest that Philip Morris U.S.A. and the Brown & Williamson Tobacco Corporation donated heavily. One document listed Mr. Pryor as the person assigned to call a lobbyist for Philip Morris who had committed to donating $25,000. The documents also suggest that Mr. Pryor was assigned to call a lobbyist for Brown & Williamson, which donated $25,000 to the association. -- New York Times, July 18, 2003

Howie "the Putz" Kurtz forgets the name and purpose of his column again, using his space to bash Democrats and the NAACP rather than "keep a watchful eye on the national media." The title of the column, "Pander Bears," says it all.

When was the last time the Putz used the word pander to characterize a Bush appeal to an anti-abortion group, a right-wing religous group or any of his wealthy contributors?

Rummy Strikes Back

The Bush White House and Matt Drudge have teamed up to play the anti-gay bigotry card. The goal: deflect attention from the growing criticism of Bush and Rummy among U.S. troops.

Some folks in the White House were apparently hopping mad when ABC News correspondent Jeffrey Kofman did a story on Tuesday's "World News Tonight" about the plummeting morale of U.S. soldiers stationed in Iraq.

So angry, in fact, that the next day, a White House operative alerted cyber-gossip Matt Drudge to the fact that Kofman is not only openly gay, he's Canadian.

Unsurprisingly, Grovel Grove only has the story half right. The Groveler reported one of Drudge's heds, "ABC NEWS REPORTER WHO FILED TROOP COMPLAINT STORY IS CANADIAN," but not the one designed to drum up anti-gay sentiment: "ABCNEWS REPORTER WHO FILED TROOP COMPLAINTS STORY -- OPENLY GAY CANADIAN... "

Surprised? Me neither. Rummy doesn't like it when the cannon fodder talks back.

Good News

The Fifth Circuit Court of Appeals has affirmed a judgment against the idiot survivors of the Branch Davidians. The litigious nimrods filed suit to collect damages from the federal government for the deaths of David Koresh's fucked-up followers. Following bench trials, U.S. District Judge Walter Smith came to the only sane conclusion, namely, that Koresh and his fellow lunatics started the fires which destroyed the Davidian compound.

A federal appeals court rejected an attempt by survivors to collect damages from the government for the deadly 1993 confrontation outside Waco, Texas, between federal agents and members of the Branch Davidian cult.

Without dissent, a three-judge panel of the 5th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals late Monday turned aside contentions that a lower court judge who ruled against the survivors was biased.

Scores of Branch Davidian members, including leader David Koresh, were killed in 1993 when government agents stormed their compound after a weekslong standoff. Survivors have been pursuing a $675 million wrongful death claim for years.

Mort Zuckerman ought to add this case to his annals of frivolous litigation. This one's even a true story.

Drudge Jags Off

The wingnuts are running scared. Drudge is blasting Florida Senator Bob Graham for "ARRIV[ing] AT VIRGINIA BLUEGRASS RALLY/FUNDRAISER TODAY -- IN JAGUAR!" What a scandal! That car probably costs more than three times one of Bush's suits!

A look at the photo reveals that Drudge is not only engaged in class warfare, he's also bashing a handicapped individual. The owner of the car undoubtedly has contributed more to the American economy than Drudge has with his little smear site.

Wednesday, July 16, 2003

The Talking Penis Reminisces

The grown-ups are back in charge at the White House.

His greatest moment? "I came in one day in March 2001 and there was a note on my desk that said, 'Ari, the president would like you to meet him on the South Lawn at 6 p.m. to play catch.' I mean, c'mon, playing catch with the president! We were like kids in the town park."
I can picture it now -- Ari, Barney and Spot. With leadership like this, it's no wonder 2001 was such a good year for the American people.

Regime Change Begins In Iraq

Somehow I don't think Bush will be too eager to count the overseas vote in 2004.

Pruden Gets Played

There's no fool like an old bigot, as Wesley Pruden demonstrates for us on a regular basis. The Moonie Times editor was forced to apologize for printing an e-mail under the name of a State Department Ambassador who never wrote the missive.

The letter was sent to us, via e-mail, on Sunday from what appeared to be the ambassador's e-mail address at the State Department," Mr. Pruden said. "The standard procedure at The Times is to verify all letters to the editor; this procedure was not followed in this instance. We will find out why, and make changes in procedures as necessary. The Times regrets the embarrassment, which we fully share � to Ambassador Minikes, to Secretary Powell, and to the State Department."

Of course, the last sentence is gibberish. Why should Minikes or Colin Powell be embarassed by the fake e-mail? The shame belongs to the Times and the neo-Confederate clowns like Pruden who run it. And no one else.

Why it got published is the easy question -- it was published because McCarthyite sentiments expressed in it are shared by Pruden, Tony Blankley and the rest of the ill-informed Moonmen who pretend to be journalists. Why bother to confirm something that confirms your prejudices?

When Pruden apologizes for the rest of the crap he puts out on a daily basis, then I'll take his apology seriously.

(Thanks to mw and Sully Watch for this item.)

Hey, Picasso!

Fans of unapt comparisons will no doubt recall this glorious masterpiece from Sully's Blue Period:

I am gamely casting about for someone to compare Andrew Sullivan to.

"Orwell," he offers, as his pancakes, eggs, and a milkshake are set on the table. We're having breakfast at the Diner -- a place he describes as "un-Washington" -- near his house in Adams-Morgan.


"Not that I would compare myself to Orwell," Sullivan adds, sensing that I might be nonplussed.

Louisville Slug

What kind of idiot spends $14,000 to disprove the charge he committed a crime in a city he's never been to? And what kind of freak talks about that alleged crime as "something terrible I didn't even remember doing" and something he woke up in middle of the night "thinking I had really done?" Geez, I'd hate to be inside that twisted mind.

P.S. Considering this guy's views on the subject, the endorsement of his book by the Reverend Al Sharpton is a nice touch.

Guide To Spotting Fake Correspondence To The Moonie Times

Tip #1: A real letter to the Moonie Times will feature at least one Father-approved comparison of homosexuality and beastiality:

"Allowing homosexual unions would be a step in the wrong direction. What's next? Recognizing unions between humans and dogs? Turtles and turkeys? Whales and pumpkins? Where will it end? Society's circle of inclusion is ever-expanding; nonetheless, the state must not give in to the whims and passions of the periphery."

Tuesday, July 15, 2003

Two Bloggers Sharing A Tiny Mind

That's Bobby Mike Kaus and Sully sniping at Howell Raines for failing to crumble at their tiny taunts. Kaus accuses Raines of "compar[ing] himself William Butler Yeats" on the Charlie Rose show. And Sully piles on, calling Raines "Pablo Picasso." Here's what Raines actually said:

And when I began studying the life of William Butler Yeats I realized that he had done something quite extraordinary which is had this incredible burst of creativity after the age of 60 into his 70s. And into -- up until very old age, Picasso comes to mind in a different context, and the impressionist painters, many of whom did their great work in the later years. I think there's a model there that a person with aspiration of an artistic literary nature can be inspired by. I'm inspired by it and I�m gonna get on with it.

In Midget Mick's vacant skull, being inspired by someone who has "done something quite extraordinary" is the same as comparing yourself to that person. In that case, Kaus should compare himself -- unfavorably -- to yeast. And Sully's definitely a Pic asso.

Koward Hurtz

I was disappointed that Howie dodged my Steno Sue query, until I saw he had more important matters to address:

Bowie, Md.: What's a "blog"?

I keep seeing this term and don't know what it means. (And I've been using the WWW since its inception; it's not like I don't know what LOL means.)

Howard Kurtz: Short for Weblog, which are one-person sites on which the authors spews all manner of opinion on just about anything.

Yeah, you have credibility, Howie. LOL.

Move over, Steve Martin. Susan Madrak at Suburban Guerrilla has the scoop on the real Flydini.

Monday, July 14, 2003

Howie "Conflict-of-Interest" Kurtz is dodging my penetrating question. You can run but you can't hide, Howie.

From National Review Online:

"WE SUPPORT U [Jonah Goldberg]

"This is a great slide show in support of the men and women in uniform. It runs a little long, but it's hard to avoid a lump in your throat if you watch it. I predict it will be sent around the web a lot in the next few weeks." (Emphasis added.)

The fucking thing is about four minutes long. I guess Lucianne Jr. can't be bothered to support the men and women in uniform even to the extent of watching an animation if it's going to burn a five-minute hole in his valuable Stratego-playing time.

Long Dong Silverado

George H.W. "Gampy" Bush isn't the only one who left his vile bodily fluids in a Pacific Rim nation, according to a Houston t.v. station:

In deposition videotape Neil Bush said, "I had had sexual intercourse with perhaps three or four, I don't remember the exact number, women, at different times."

He said it happened while he was in Southeast Asia several years ago. "In Thailand once, I have a pretty clear recollection that there was one time in Thailand and in Hong Kong," said Neil Bush in the deposition. "After you were married to Mrs. Bush?" a lawyer asked. He answered, "Yes."

When asked at depostion whether the women were prostitutes, he said he did not know, but denied paying them any money. (Emphasis added.)

It certainly wasn't your personality, Neil.

More interesting than Neil's sordid whore-hopping is the question of who paid for Neil's pleasure. In 2000, The Nation reported about former President G.H.W. Bush's ties with the Charoen Pokphand Group, "an enormous Bangkok-based agribusiness and telecommunications conglomerate and one of the largest foreign investors in China." The Nation found that

The Bush-CP Group connection extends to Neil Bush, one of President Bush's sons, who earned notoriety when, in 1992, he agreed to pay $50,000 to settle civil litigation related to the billion-dollar collapse of the Silverado Savings & Loan Association. (Bush, who sat on the S&L's board, was accused of concealing his business relationships with two of the bank's largest debtors.) During President Bush's 1994 visit to Bangkok, the former President met with officials of TelecomAsia, the CP Group subsidiary. According to a local newspaper account, Bush and the CP Group discussed "cooperative business ventures between Thailand and the United States." Soon after, Neil Bush created the Interlink Management Corporation, an international cable communications firm, which then sought out business opportunities for US firms in China. (Neil Bush set up shop in his father's office in Houston.) By November 1996 Neil Bush, through Interlink, had established a "joint venture consulting company" with the CP Group, according to the Financial Times of London, which published no other details about the deal. At that time, Neil Bush told the Associated Press that "joining with a company like CP is the best way to go. They already have the contacts and the access that can be so difficult for a company just coming in to get."

And they know all the best hookers.

On one ocassion in November 1996, Neilsie accompanied the CEO of CP Group, Dhanin Chearavanont, "to the grand opening of a CP Group motorcycle plant in Shanghai, China." They were joined by a Thai businesswoman later convicted of making illegal campaign contributions to the DNC. The article does not reveal whether Neil got his WASPy wiener wangled in Shanghai.

Could it be that Gampy was indirectly pimpin' for Neil, getting his loser son laid at the same time he was setting up deals for him? Let's hope that Sharon always used protection.

(Note: Registration required for headline link. Story found at Eschaton.)

Sunday, July 13, 2003

Welcome, Enemies!

The increasingly malicious Roger Ailes welcomes the latest additions to his Enemies List:

Crooked Timber

Sadly, No!

Teddy Nutmeg

Enjoy. And tell 'em Roger sent you.

Idiot On Idiot

Kitty Parker on Kathy Lopez:

During the Iraq war, "warbloggers" often posted new developments far ahead of the mainstream. Kathryn Jean Lopez, editor of National Review Online, slept maybe 4.5 hours the entire three weeks as she posted on the site's group blog, "The Corner." Put it this way, as you were waking up, Lopez was on her third Diet Coke.

Well, that would explain the quality of her contributions. It doesn't explain how Lopez learned of "new developments far ahead of the mainstream," if she was sitting on her ass and drinking Diet Coke instead of actually covering the news.

Not One Sentence

I've just skimmed through Howie "Conflict-of-Interest" Kurtz's weekly Media Backtalk transcripts back to April 9, and was unable to find even a single sentence referring to the Post's shameful reporting of the Jessica Lynch story. (The fraudulent story, by Steno Sue Schmidt and Vernon Loeb, was published on April 3.) On the other hand, if I had a dollar for every time the word Blair appeared in the transcripts, I'd be buying a new computer right now.

Howie's got another little chit-chat this Monday. I'll be at work so I can't pose the question, but here's what I'd ask:

Last Thursday, Bob Woodward told Larry King that the Washington Post's reports by Susan Schmidt and Vernon Loeb on the Private Jessica Lynch story were "wrong." [Included so Howie can't use the "old news" dodge.] Doesn't the Post owe it to its readers to identify the Administration officials who, according to the Post, used your paper to lie to the public about the capture of Private Lynch? If not, why should the Post's readers ever trust an anonymous Administration source you quote, or another story by Ms. Schmidt or Mr. Loeb?

Of course Howie wouldn't acknowledge the question, but maybe it would make him sweat a little.

Update: I just realized that you can send questions in advance, to give Howie more time to prepare his dodge.

Saturday, July 12, 2003

Roger's Online G.O.Personals

"I am 31 years old. My birthday is September 26. I am looking to meet new people and, hopefully, become friends. During my spare time, I enjoy reading, working puzzles, and writing. I love rainbows, Mickey Mouse, the beach, the mountains, and waterfalls. My favorite color is navy blue and my favorite flower is the daisy. I am a Christian and I enjoy attending church. I consider myself to be sensitive, caring, and kind-hearted."
Wow. She sounds perfect. I wonder what the catch is.

Friday, July 11, 2003

Poser Alert

As pointed out by Sullywatch, Sully praises the following rhyme by Canibus as a "patrotic rap" that's "a little crude," but "not a pose":

Lurkin' to leave y'all with bloody red turbans
Screamin' "Jihad!" while y'all pray to a false god"

Here's another paean to patriotism attributed to America's Rapper:

Well I'm here now, verbal ass whippins bout to get shared out
Wack niggas bout to get aired out
Faggit [sic] niggas get they ass teared out

Tell me again why we should take Sully's criticisms of Ann Coulter and Michael Savage seriously.

Just One Sentence


Life imprisonment without possibility of parole.

Thursday, July 10, 2003

Mickey Kaus, the Fresh Putz of Bel Air, explains "the destructive legacy of ... hip hop culture in general" to his readers. (Actually, he doesn't. He just assumes that everyone agree with his assertion.) It's not clear whether Kaus's encyclopedic knowledge of hip hop culture was gained during visits to Harvard Club, at his gym in Venice, or in chats with his racist web buddies at (see last item).

His Failure to Say "Die And Go To Hell" Was The Major Concern

Undoubtedly it was the groundswell of criticism generated by Roger Ailes' blanket coverage which caused "Christian broadcaster" Salem Communications to suspend Michael Weiner Savage from KRLA in Los Angeles. Of course, the suspension is just a smokescreen, since the broadcaster intends to lift it as soon as Weiner's syndicator says the bigot's outburst won't happen again. And there's really no difference between Weiner's outburst and the hate he spews on the radio every day. But there's nothing like blatant fundie hypocrisy to lighten one's spirit.

Beat On The Brat With A Baseball Bat

(Read with a Wisconsin accent, after a couple of Old Styles. Then you'll get it.)

Four More Years! Four More Years!

Grand Old Police Blotter: Fundraisers, Crooks and Thieves Edition

Remember Roger Stone, the G.O.P. political consultant who allegedly placed nude photographs of himself in a swinger's magazine? (I say allegedly because I can't find much about the story except for this Margaret Carlson article from 1996.) The Washington Post says he's the sugar daddy behind a political action committee which engaged in illegal fundraising in an effort to unseat the Florida Supreme Court justices who nearly thwarted Electiontheft 2000. The Florida Election Commission is considering whether to levy fines of up to $450,000 against the G.O.P. chairwoman of the PAC.

For his part, Stone is threatening to sue the Florida Election Commission "for harming his reputation." Is it possible to damage the reputation of a G.O.P. consultant who seeks sex partners through porno mags?

Wednesday, July 09, 2003

Eviction Notice

Your humble correspondent always wanted to be an editorial cartoonist, and was thwarted from reaching that dream only by an amazing lack of artistic ability.

To make up for that void in my life, I'm going to order a copy of Eviction Notice, a self-published collection of political cartoons by the gifted Mikhaela B. Reid. One day this book will be a collector's item (but don't buy it for that reason).

More On The Weiner

According to the Chronic, the Savage Weiner was brought down by a dorky talk-radio groupie who made a crack about Savage's bad teeth. (Weiner characterized the comments as a "vicious personal attack.")

Weiner also claims that MSNBC's president, Erik Sorenson, told him two weeks ago, "We love your show." Sounds credible to me.

Army Says Steno Sue's Reports Are Garbage

The Army's 15-page report officially will debunk accounts that Pfc. Lynch emptied two revolvers at her attackers and was shot and stabbed before being taken prisoner of war. In fact, she was riding in a Humvee that was struck by a projectile during a frantic attempt to escape the ambush. She suffered "horrific injuries," said Pentagon sources familiar with the report.

Pfc. Lori Ann Piestewa, a good friend of Pfc. Lynch's, was driving the Humvee. The strike on the vehicle caused her to lose control. The utility vehicle smashed into a disabled tractor-trailer at more than 45 mph, critically injuring Pfc. Piestewa, the Pentagon sources said.

Rumors surfaced that Pfc Piestewa, 23, of Tuba City, Ariz., was killed by Iraqis at the scene. But the Pentagon sources said she died later at a Nasiriyah hospital of injuries suffered in the crash. She was the only military woman to die in Operation Iraqi Freedom, Pentagon statistics show.

Pfc. Lynch also was pulled from the wreckage and taken to the same hospital. "Lynch survived principally because of the medical attention she received from the Iraqis," one source said. -- Associated Press

It's time for Len Downie to start up the fog machines again.

Who Would Jesus Call A Pig?

The Los Angeles Times reports:

A call to [Michael] Savage's radio program, which reaches an estimated 6 million listeners, was not returned by press time. The radio show is heard locally on KRLA-AM (870), which is owned by Christian broadcaster Salem Communications Corp. and features a lineup of conservative commentators. 'Savage Nation,' also the title of the host's bestselling book, is distributed by Central Point, Ore.-based Talk Radio Network, whose lineup of hosts includes former Congressman Bob Dornan.

A non-Christian bigot broadcast by Christian broadcasters and published by a Christian publisher. Now that's diversity!

And here's the tolerant folks on Salem's God-fearing Editorial Advisory Board. Hugh Hewitt, Janet Parshall and Mike Medved (especially Medved) must be proud of the company they keep.

Tuesday, July 08, 2003

Newt, Clueless As Ever

From the Moonie Times:

Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich says he's proven his critics wrong � including Deputy Secretary of State Richard Armitage and former Republican Rep. Jack Kemp of New York � who had "taken me to task" for arguing that the State Department was engaging in a "deliberate and systematic effort" to undermine President Bush's foreign policy.
Writing in the July/August issue of Foreign Policy magazine, Mr. Gingrich observes: "Only six days following my remarks, Bush made the following statement to a group of Iraqi Americans in Dearborn, Michigan: 'The Iraqi people are fully capable of self-government.' ...

"Contrast that vision with a recent classified report by the State Department's Bureau of Intelligence and Research, titled 'Iraq, the Middle East and Change: No Dominoes,' " says Mr. Gingrich.

The report, first obtained by the Los Angeles Times, states that "liberal democracy would be difficult to achieve" in Iraq, while "electoral democracy, were it to emerge, could well be subject to exploitation by anti-American elements."

This item, from the reliably sub-literate John McCaslin, is so poorly written it's hard to tell exactly what Newt is claiming. Is Newt arguing that the State Department is "deliberately and systematically" trying to undermine Bush's foreign policy by writing a classified report, or by leaking the report? In either case, it's hard to see how the State Department is undermining Bush's policy by pointing out the blindingly obvious. Does Newtie seriously think that if elections were held in Iraq there wouldn't be anti-American candidates? Not bloody likely. Does he think that democracy will arise in Iraq if we all just play along with Bush's politically-motivated cheerleading?

Call me crazy, but I'm not buying the argument that anti-American sentiment in Iraq is the product of a confidential State Department report never seen or read in that country.

Dumpster Diving With The Axis of Evil Guy

The incomparable Jesse Taylor at delivers the biggest spanking to David Frum since Amanda Dim caught David TiVoing Stripperella. The most telling part is how Frum's correction is misleading and equally inaccurate as the original claim.

Maybe Frum still hasn't gotten the hang of United States currency yet.

For more context, the portion of the Blumenthal book under discussion is here (in Salon premium; access requires viewing an ad).

A Two-Fer

Rover Boy Howie Kurtz quotes Rover Boy Howie Fineman bashing Democratic presidential hopeful Howard Dean. The Two Howies don't like Dean's comic timing.

Why Is Erik Weiner Sorensen Still Employed?

Try as it might to distance itself from the bigot it hired with open eyes, MSNBC can't hide the fact it was an active participant in Michael Savage's bigotry:

Later in the show, during a discussion of the recent U.S. Supreme Court decision invalidating state anti-sodomy laws, the words "Supreme Court Sodomizes America" were seen on the screen, according to GLAAD, which today put out a statement saying it was "about time" MSNBC canned Savage.
MSNBC wasn't bothered by Savage's anti-gay views; it only acted when Savage said he hoped for the death of one of the channel's three viewers.

Hey Erik, I think the Philadelphia Daily News has an opening you qualify for.

Monday, July 07, 2003

Yellow Journalism Other Than Fox News

From Jim Capozzola's TRR: The Lighter Side of Rittenhouse comes news of the Worst Job in Journalism:

"Confronted with a noxious puddle or pile, who ya gonna call?

The Daily News Stinkmeister, voice of the pee-and-poop-plagued public.

Phone Stinkmeister's hot line: 215-854-2600.

Or e-mail Stinkmeister:

Stinkmeister will investigate as many calls and e-mails as possible and will mention the worst offenders in future reports."

Not only must the reporter investigate the odoriferous locations, he or she must rank them as well. I can think of many journos who are particularly well-suited for this job.

Update (7/8): Maybe Poynter should have a seminar on the risk that a bodily fluids reporter will manufacture the news.

Snitchens, Portrait of A Serial Space Filler

Of all the unhistorical nonsense Chris Hitchens has somehow gotten published recently, this is by far the worst:
"In the past few years, I have written often about whether the figure of Saddam Hussein is�or was�a model taken from Hitler, from Stalin, or from some combination of the two. It has occurred to me recently that it can all be put more simply. He is�or was�a reincarnation of Jeffrey Dahmer. Look in his kitchen drawer, and you will find instruments of torture. Look in his bathroom cabinet, and you will find poisons. Look under his floorboards, and you will find bones and skulls. Look in his flowerbed, and you will stumble over body parts. Look in the rest of the garden, and you will find a substantial piece of a nuclear centrifuge, employed to make weapons of mass destruction."

Can you believe this garbage? Everyone knows Jeffrey Dahmer didn't bury anyone under the floorboards. And he certainly didn't plant anyone in his garden. Dahmer lived in a apartment and used a freezer to store remains he couldn't otherwise destroy. It was John Wayne Gacy, a suburban homeowner, who buried his victims under the floor of his house. Is a little historical accuracy too much to expect from our modern Orwell?

I suppose it wouldn't be sporting to remind Snitch that Dahmer was raised in a Bushite red state and took his killing spree to Wisconsin, where he murdered numerous law-abiding, patriotic and progressive blue state residents.

(Edited per Rick's correction in comments.)

Floyd Fithian, 1927-2003: Rest In Peace

LAFAYETTE, Ind., July 6 (AP) � Floyd Fithian, a former United States representative from Indiana and professor at Purdue University, died on June 27 at a retirement home in Annandale, Va. He was 76.

Mr. Fithian, a Democrat who was also a farmer, represented the heavily Republican Lafayette area in Congress from 1975 to 1983.

In 1976, Mr. Fithian became the first Democrat to win re-election in the area, and he held the seat for three elections.

After he lost his seat, he never again sought elective office, but he became chief of staff for Paul Simon when he was a senator from Illinois. Mr. Fithian was Mr. Simon's top aide and fund-raiser until 1992.

Pick Me! Pick Me!

Little Bobby Kaus has thrown his hat into the ring for the possible California governor's recall election ... or at least he's seeking a financial backer:

"If conservatives are smart, actually, they'll put up a right-winger who is nominally a Democrat. At the very least, he'd split the vote." (Emphasis in original.)

Who else could he be talking about? Zell Miller? Lyndon LaRouche?


He's already been delinked from the bio page. Before MSNBC sends this page down the memory hole completely, take one last look at right-wing cable's proudest moment -- The Savage Nation.

Of course, the page is also cached here, for the ages.

Remedial Media

Katha Pollitt on our liberal press:

Subject: Cleaning up the spoken word. It seems to be mostly immigrants, blacks, the lower-class and the rural whose language errors and dialectical variants are reproduced literally in the press. But when George W. Bush says "nucular" the press records "nuclear."

Ax yourself why that is.

Sunday, July 06, 2003

Roger's Lemon-Fresh Mail Sack

One of the most enjoyable things about publishing this blog is the feedback I receive both in comments and e-mail. I've also noticed that I get two types of e-mail at that I don't often get at other e-mail addresses: The Nigerian/third-world-country bank account-wire transfer scam and a German/Swedish language cam-girls solicitation. I get at least two or three of each per week, much more than in any other account I've had. The address must have gotten onto lists for these particular enterprises.

Sometimes the spam is more interesting. Last week, I got an e-mail from a gentleman seeking a talent agent in the independent gay film industry. Must have gotten me confused with Mike Ovitz or something. But the best part of the e-mail was the sender's claim, "I actually am known in my films for performing with lemons, a unique niche." Can't argue with that.

It must be a gag, but I'm afraid I don't get it.

Saturday, July 05, 2003

Conason on the Clown Forum

In which Joe C. demonstrates that freepers and dildoheads are masochists who enjoy having their money taken by a fraud and being made to look like fools:
Her deceptive style is exemplified in an anecdote she lifts from an actual historian and twists to smear Truman. She writes: "Most breathtakingly, in March 1946, Truman ostentatiously rebuffed Churchill after his famous Iron Curtain speech in Fulton, Missouri. Immediately after Churchill's speech, Truman instructed his Secretary of State Dean Acheson not to attend a reception for Churchill a week later in New York."

In that passage -- footnoted to James Chace's magisterial 1998 biography of Acheson -- Coulter demonstrates that she is both an intentional liar and an incompetent writer. The pages she cites from Chace explain quite clearly that Acheson (who was not then Secretary of State and would not be promoted to that office until 1949) was urged to avoid the New York reception by Secretary of State James Byrnes, not Truman. The British apparently didn't notice that "ostentatious rebuff," since they immediately invited Acheson and his wife to a cordial lunch with Churchill in Washington. And as for Truman, Chace notes that it was he who had invited Churchill to Missouri, his home state, to deliver the speech -- which the American president read in advance, assuring the former prime minister that his strong warning about communist intentions would "do nothing but good."

Coming up from the Clown Forum, the bastard child of Random House: Books by Tammy Bruce and "Carl Limbacher and News Max."

Tammy's book exposes how "the Gay Elite exploit our children�under the guise of tolerance and education�to satisfy their sexual obsessions." I wonder how Random House's Gay Elite writers, including Edmund White, Rita Mae Brown, Andrew Tobias, David Mixner and yes, Sully, feel about that.

Thursday, July 03, 2003

Happy Independence Day (United States)

Go out and exercise your constitutional rights. Preferably the ones Scalia hates.

Roger Ailes will return on July 5 -- the day we strike hack.

His Glorious Career

Little Mickey Kaus is fascinated by the fact that Hillary Clinton failed the District of Columbia bar examination. No doubt Senator Clinton's legal career isn't as long and hugely successful as some, but she can take consolation in the fact that she became a United States Senator and popular best-selling author rather than a talentless hack who recycles the reporting of others in a tedious weblog.

Wednesday, July 02, 2003

Why are people debating whether the federal Do Not Call list is an unwarranted government regulation? Tens of thousands of municipalities in this country have ordinances allowing residents and businesses to post signs telling door-to-door solicitors to piss off. These ordinances are about as controversial as clean water and blue skies. Only a nimrod like Jonah Goldberg would see the Do Not Call registry as big government intrusion on freedom or the product of "the nanny state."

Somerby on MSNBC Tonight

From the Howler:

PRESSING THE FLESH: Our entire staff will appear on tonight�s Buchanan & Press, on MSNBC. Our segment begins at 6:30 P.M., but why not throw the boys a bone and watch the entire hour?

Today's edition.

The Goldberg Trepidations

A letter at Romenesko:


Just in case you needed one, here's yet another example of the fallacy of the so-called liberal media -- and a great example, too, of what utter wimps many conservative pundits really are.

Yesterday, a producer at Boston's NPR-affiliate, WBUR, was so eager to get in touch with me that she contacted my editors at both New York Press and Newsday with urgent missives, and also sent me e-mail via my web site. Writing on behalf of the news program The Connection, she wanted me to participate on a show this morning on same-sex marriage. The other guests would be writer E.J. Graff and National Review's Jonah Goldberg. I was on the air myself at the time, doing my own daily three-hour radio program, and didn't get the messages until 4 p.m. I called the relieved producer at that time and told her I could do it. She said she'd have me go to an NPR studio in Manhattan, but also inquired if I could do it from my studio at Sirius Satellite, so definitive was she about having me on.

Then I received a phone call back at 6:30: I was "off the hook" for the show, thank you very much. Turns out conservative pundit Goldberg would not do the show with me. The producer noted that they don't usually let a guest "dictate" who the other guests are, but that it was late and thus hard to find another conservative. That sounded pretty bogus: finding a conservative pundit to do a radio program is about as difficult as finding a drag queen at gay pride.

And what exactly turned fire-breathing, macho Goldberg into a little sissy, running away from a homosexual columnist? The producer said that Goldberg implied to her that we'd had some words, though Goldberg and I have never spoken nor have we ever even exchanged an e-mail. He did "admit," she said, that I am a "powerful" gay columnist (yes, I laughed at that one), but that I'd put out "misinterpretations" of his work. I guess one of those "misinterpretations" was when I criticized him in New York Press after he floated the totally unfounded idea that the Washington, DC sniper suspects were really gay lovers and then gleefully called the capture of the suspects a possible "threefer" (because they were Muslim, African-American and, in the minds of Goldberg and his fellow right-wing smear artists, possibly homosexual).

The other "misinterpretation" might have been when I wrote a column in New York Press exposing one of his editors at the Washington Times, Robert Stacy McCain, as a member of the League of the South, a racist Southern secessionist group. Goldberg had just spent a week piously calling on Trent Lott to step down as Senate Majority leader because of his racially insensitive remarks and now he was exposed as working for an out and out racist himself. (The folks at the American Prospect's blog soon called on Goldberg to follow his own advice to Lott and step down from the Washington Times, but he did not -- nor did he respond at all.)

So, here you have a perfect example of how liberal voices are shut out of the so-called liberal media at the behest of cowardly conservative columnists who spend much of their time railing that the media favor liberals. Even more curious was when the producer of the supposedly liberal NPR affiliate told me that Goldberg said he didn't like my journalism or my "tactics" -- particularly around the issue of "outing" -- and I replied to her how supremely ironic that was given that he is the child of Lucianne Goldberg, the salacious web-maven who helped expose Bill Clinton's sex life and whom Jonah has defended to the hilt. The producer's response: Who is Lucianne Goldberg? Yes, more evidence of that well-informed, agenda-driven liberal media.

Shocking. Especially after Lucianne, Jr. faced off against those hard-hitting journalists at Faux & Fiends.

What the hell is it with Blogger anyway?
Blogger is acting up again, not allowing me to edit posts and causing me to lose posts. I'll try to remedy some of this (such as the formatting in the previous post) when I get a chance.

Liberal Activism In the Courts

Here's a guy who must be taking the loss of Ol' Strom harder than most. Like most conservative columnists, Paul Craig Roberts is railing against the Supreme Court this week. But Paul is railing against the Warren Court.

Yes, Paul believes that most of this country's problems were caused by that unconstitutional liberal power-grab known as Brown v. Board of Education. Paul lets out all that anger he's been holding in for the past forty-nine years.

The substitution of sociology for law is the legacy of the 1954 Brown desegregation decision.

Devoid of any legal argument, the Brown decision rested on sociological testimony about whether black children preferred white to black dolls and on Swedish socialist Gunnar Myrdal's assertion that white Americans are "aversive racists." This meant, Myrdal asserted, that democracy would perpetuate segregation as long as whites comprised a political majority. To end segregation, the Supreme Court would have to usurp the legislative function.

That is precisely what the Court did in 1954. Although liberals cheered the end of "separate but equal," constitutional lawyers were disturbed by the absence of legal reasoning in the Court's ruling. For example, Columbia Law Professor Herbert Wechsler, a consultant to the NAACP in the Brown case, told the Harvard Law School that he was unable to find the constitutional principal [sic] that justified the decision. He recommended that the Brown decision be accepted on faith.


Both Brown and Grutter are declared to be "landmark decisions." Yet, both are devoid of legal basis. After a half-century of a civil rights cause driven by the principle that the ends justify the means, we have a legal system that is based in sociological rant.

Now there's some profound legal reasoning. Brown is devoid of legal basis because ... Paul says so. "Separate but equal [sic]" is constitutionally ordained, says he. We are no longer a country of laws, but one where vile Negroes get to sit beside our pure white children in history class, even if we maintain the fiction that segregated schools are equal.

The sad part is that Bill Rehnquist could have written this crap.

Tuesday, July 01, 2003

Redick Redux

Republican Mayor Dennis Redick does claim that there's a woman to blame. And his girlfriend now claims that she was the aggressor and Redick was the innocent victim.

Originally, according to the Indianapolis Star,

[Sylvia] Clemons told officers that Redick then pushed her onto the hood of the car and held her there until the limo driver, Russell Holloman, pulled him away, the [police report] says.

Upon reflection, however, Clemons claims that Dennis is the noblest noble in all of Noblesville:

"Like many couples, Dennis and I have issues that we continually work on as our relationship grows," Clemons said in a prepared statement. ". . . Last Thursday night, my frustration with a recurring issue of ours led to my taking this argument too far. I began to hit Dennis around the shoulder and abdomen area, and Dennis tried to restrain me. He grabbed my wrists to prevent me from hitting him and pushed my wrists against my chest. This apparently left the impression that his hands were around my neck, which was not the case."

The woman went on to say that she has struggled with alcohol in the past and she was intoxicated Thursday night "to the point I lost control."

It is not known whether Clemons's struggles with alcohol involved her hitting the alcohol in the abdomen and the alcohol grabbing her wrists and pinning her to the hood of a limousine.

Maybe the District Attorney should charge them both with battery and let a jury (or juries) sort it out.

John Lott's House of Style

[CHRIS] MATTHEWS: It could happen-teacher is at the blackboard chalking up some math lesson, kid runs up real fast, grabs it out of her drawer, he knows it�s there.

[JOHN] LOTT: It�s not going to be in her drawer.

MATTHEWS: Where would it be?

LOTT: It would be on her in some way.

LEAR: How does a teacher in a summer dress carry a gun on her?

LOTT: You can carry it inside your thigh. There�s lot of places you can carry it where somebody is not going to see where it is.

Something tells me John has given this matter a lot of thought.

Speaking of idiots, Spinsanity quickly and quite thoroughly disposes of the fraudulent claim that Treason is non-fiction. The folks at Random House's Clown Forum should be mighty proud.

Roger's Word of The Day



\Mal"kin\, n. [Dim. of Maud, the proper name. Cf. Grimalkin.] [Written also maukin.] 1. Originally, a kitchenmaid; a slattern. --Chaucer.

2. A mop made of clouts, used by the kitchen servant.

3. A scarecrow. [Prov. Eng.]

4. (Mil.) A mop or sponge attached to a jointed staff for swabbing out a cannon.

Hey, Chaucer said it, not me.

The Thomas Guide To Lying

Hey, here's Thomas Sowell, blowing smoke up our asses in another brilliant expose of the liberal media:

In the recent Supreme Court decision upholding affirmative action at the University of Michigan Law School, a front-page news story in the New York Times reported the arguments used in Justice Sandra Day O'Connor's majority opinion but simply dismissed the dissenting arguments of Justice Clarence Thomas by saying that he "took as his text not the briefs but his own life story."

Those who doubt the existence of media bias should go on the Internet to find Justice Thomas' opinion ( ) and read it for themselves to see if there is anything anywhere in it that bears any resemblance whatever to the characterization used by the New York Times to keep its readers from knowing what his arguments were.

The New York Times has every right to be in favor of affirmative action. But that is very different from preventing its readers from knowing what the arguments are against it -- especially in what is presented as a "news" story, rather than a front-page editorial. (Emphasis added.)

The only problem with Sowell's argument is that it's a crock of crap. The NYT printed verbatim huge chunks of Thomas's dissenting opinion. (And, of course, the paper didn't "keep" or "prevent" anyone from reading Thomas's entire dissent.) It's Sowell's column that bears no resemblance to the truth. Reading Sowell's writings, one might suspect that the Hoover Institution has an affirmative action program -- for hacks.


It's even worse than I thought. At the new blog Sadly, No, the astute Seb took the time to re-read the NYT article, which I skipped because I thought it was archived and was too cheap to pay for it. He points out that article contains many quotes from Thomas's dissent from which readers can learn Thomas's arguments against the Michigan Law School affirmative action policy. In fact, "The article has 21 paragraphs. 6 are devoted exclusively to O'Connor. Two cover both justices. The other 13 deal with Thomas' dissent." More proof that it's Sowell who has contempt for his readers, and not the NYT.

Poll Says Most People Are Idiots

Fein v. Fein

Bruce Fein, special counsel to child pornographers, doesn't much care for Lawrence v. Texas. Maybe Fein's just jealous that the plaintiffs' lawyers in Lawrence got much better results than he did for his client, a Clinton-hating, racist producer/director/star of child pornography.

Malkin Does The Math

Never mind that the annual breast cancer case rate in the region � 117 cases per every 100,000 women � is just a few percent higher than the national rate of about 114 per 100,000 annually.

In a column about "junk science" no less.

Mistating facts, doctoring quotes, failing to contact subjects, engaging in slander. These guys say it's time to take a critical look at Conflict-of-Interest Kurtz.