Stolen From The Latest Number of Private Eye For The Benefit Of Our Audience In The United Kingdom

What you will see in today�s soaraway Daily Gnomegraph:

Page one: Peace comes to Iraq as bomb goes off.
Page two: Why everyone is backing IDS.
Pages three to ninety-four: Pieces by the proprietor�s wife attacking Arafat, BBC, etc, etc.

I wish you well, Mr Newbloke, and suggest you remember the old newspaper edict �Moore Means The Sack�.

Lord Conrad Gnome
The Daily Gnomegraph

Media whorespeak -- the universal language.