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The Remainder of the Day

Many have been goofing on the change of subtitle in J. Jonah Pantsload's forthcoming tome, Spank Me, Adolf. The new subtit. is now "The Totalitarian Temptation from Hegel to Whole Foods."

Sure, the publisher's long-standing description of the book said nothing about pricey, elitist organic grocery stores and their relationship to totalitarianism, but as the Pantload always says, they haven't read the book so they're in no position to critique it. And who can question Goldberg's marketing brilliance in referencing a philosopher almost noone's read and a grocery chain most have never visited.

What no one* seems to have noticed, as far as I can tell, is amazon.com's strange description of the book:

"Liberal Fascism: The Totalitarian Temptation from Hegel to Whole Foods (Foam Book)

by Jonah Goldberg (Colorist)" (Emphasis added.)

It's not clear what this means. Does each copy come pre-flecked with Goldberg's own spittle? Are the pages saturated with nonoxyno-9, or do they double as floatation devices? Perhaps it's printed on recycled packing peanuts.

And is the Pantload supplementing his income by maintaining Tommy Thompson's auburn highlights?

I expect it means that someone at amazon or Doubleday has read the book and is duly impressed.

Oh, and it also appears to have increased in size:

Product Details

Foam Book: 496 pages

That's just throwing good money after bad.

* Except this blogger

Labels: dough, loads, pants

Grand Old Police Blotter: Hoosier Daddy's Boy Edition

I have a fair amount of understanding for the plight of teens who encounter the police while intoxicated or occupying a vehicle in which dope is hidden. And not all of us at that age have the ability to keep our heads about us and avoid detection and/or punishment. But I don't understand the arrogance of some who see persecution in such mundane events.

Take one David Wichlinski, the future of the Grand Old Party:

David Wichlinski, the 18-year-old Porter Township Board member, was silent Monday, less than 24 hours after his arrest for underage drinking and possession of drug paraphernalia.

Wichlinski was taken into custody about 8 p.m. Sunday by Valparaiso police after he and a friend were stopped near the McDonald's restaurant on Calumet Avenue in Valparaiso.

It's the third time in four months Wichlinski, a recent Boone Grove High School graduate and son of former Porter Township Trustee Robert Wichlinski, has had a brush with the law.

David Wichlinski avoided charges in February after he was accused of giving the middle finger to two police officers and again in April when police found a marijuana seed in his truck.

On Sunday, police were called to the McDonald's restaurant after receiving a complaint of an intoxicated driver at the restaurant's drive-through.

Police arrived and noticed a red Ford Mustang as it reversed into the restaurant parking lot and parked in a handicap parking spot.

Police stopped and talked with the driver, Ryan Kubal, 20, of Valparaiso, but David Wichlinski exited the vehicle and walked away. According to the police report, Wichlinski ignored requests to stop and acted as if he were talking on a cell phone.

Wichlinski crossed Calumet Avenue and police attempted to stop him at the Arby's restaurant, where police said he was stumbling in circles, before finally stopping him in the Premier Grill parking lot.

Wichlinski then asked the police officer why he was being stopped. The officer said he immediately smelled alcohol on Wichlinski's breath and asked him why he didn't stop, but received no answer.

Wichlinski denied drinking, but a portable breath test registered 0.050 percent.

...

Police searched Kubal's vehicle and found a glass smoking pipe in the glove compartment with residue of what police said smelled like burnt marijuana. Kubal told police it belonged to Wichlinski. Kubal also told police that Wichlinski had been drinking beer at a graduation party.

...

Wichlinski, a Republican, was elected to the Porter Township Board in November and was touted as one of the youngest, if not the youngest, elected officials in the state.

So far, no problem. Just party smarter. But young Master Davey isn't just any spotty-faced three-time loser; he's a victim. Upon resigning from his Board seat a day after the story broke, Davey stated:

I apologize to everyone whom I have disappointed and embarrassed including my family, friends, the Republican Party, our Township Board and the citizens of Porter Township.

I think it's fair to say that the press went a little hard on me, but that goes with the territory. I clearly was not prepared for such merciless scrutiny, but I guess I should have expected it given my age and my last name.

As far as I can tell from Google News, the story quoted above is the only "merciless scrutiny" that Davey's bust got before his resignation -- and it's a straightforward recounting of the arresting officer's allegations (likely taken directly from the arrest report), along with a recitation of Davey's failure to respond to requests for his comment. Davey's delusions of importance, and sense of persecution, are quite advanced for a whiny little drunk and (alleged) pothead with a do-nothing political job.

But Davey's daddy's sense of injury is even loftier. Says Robert Wichlinski:

It's apparently true that, 'people are more interested in reading about and believing the bad stuff.' Not once did anyone mention what a fine job David was doing on the Township Board, or that he graduated with honors from Boone Grove and was inducted into the academic Hall of Fame ... not even once. How disappointing is that?

Democracy in America remains an experiment; this is simply one test that did not yield positive results, but it should in no way diminish our resolve to improve and continue to innovate.

Don't worry. I'm sure Davey's tests by his probation officer will yield positive results. And we won't let your punk kid's inept partying destroy our faith in democracy.

Not even once.






How disappointing is that, Bob?

Death Or Glory

Ted Nugent comes out against fucking.

Holy Fuck

Joe Lieberman, wrong again:

Lieberman, 65, described the 2008 presidential race as the most important election of his adult life.

In Memory of James M. Capozzola, Proprietor of The Rittenhouse Review

Like many other of Jim's admirers, I never met him, I received encouraging e-mails from him, and I envied his admirable gifts as a writer. His posts were elegant and free of profanity, and they were also pointed and fierce. Take, for example, "Land of Airheads & Steriodal Jerks," in honor of the California recall election. His eviscerations of Camile Paglia and Norah Vincent and Ruth Shalit and Dumber Andy Sullivan were rollicking fun. He wrote about his interests and his dinner companions and his bulldog, that is, about what interested him rather than just what dominated the political blogosphere at the time.

As Anothony mentioned, Jim generously paid for the permanent removal of the banner ad from this site back when those ads appeared above all the blogs hosted on BlogSpot. That act kept me encouraged when this blog was small and unknown. It is an act of kindness I'll never forget, for as long as I can remember.

P.S. Susie Madrak shares memories of Jim here.

Thank You

I'd like to thank Julia of Sisyphus Shrugged, Anthony Cartouche of Yazoo Street Scandal and Tom Hilton of If I Ran The Zoo for posting here while I was on vacation. Your kindnesses are much appreciated.

I'd also like to extend an apology to the bloggers who offered to fill in but were unable to participate because I screwed up their Blogger invites.

I'll be back to posting later today. I hope to include some thoughts about the untimely passing of the graceful Jim Capozzola.

Wednesday, Bloody Wednesday

Three people were killed and two injured during a shooting on Sky Lane Drive in Cleveland at 12:10 a.m.

Police said a Cleveland firefighter was arrested.

Officers said 35-year-old Terrance Hough was a neighbor who had asked the victims to keep the noise down as they were setting off fireworks. When they didn't stop, police said, he took out a gun and opened fire.

I guess that'll teach them a sharp lesson.

The online edition of Cleveland's best and only daily newspaper, The Plain Dealer, reports that there were three other separate shootings, two of which took place at or outside bars, with three victims near death. And as if that wasn't enough, there was also an incident of a woman found stabbed to death inside her apartment.

This year's was the kind of Fourth of July that makes me regard this one with nostalgia.

(Cross-posted at Yazoo Street Scandal.)

James Capozzola, 1962-2007

President Bush Monday spared former vice presidential aide Lewis "Scooter" Libby from going to prison for 2 1/2 years for obstructing the CIA leak investigation, a White House official said.

The official said Bush "has commuted the prison sentence ... leaving intact the probation and fines handed down by the court."

"That means he is not going to jail," the official said.

Libby, Vice President Dick Cheney's former chief of staff, was sentenced to prison for lying and obstructing an investigation into who blew the cover of a CIA agent whose husband criticized the Iraq war.

I don’t believe my role [as governor] is to replace the verdict of a jury with my own, unless there are new facts or evidence of which a jury was unaware, or evidence that the trial was somehow unfair.

Washington, DC — Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid made the following statement today after President Bush commuted the prison sentence of former White House aide I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby for obstruction of justice:

"The President's decision to commute Mr. Libby's sentence is disgraceful. Libby's conviction was the one faint glimmer of accountability for White House efforts to manipulate intelligence and silence critics of the Iraq War. Now, even that small bit of justice has been undone. Judge Walton correctly determined that Libby deserved to be imprisoned for lying about a matter of national security. The Constitution gives President Bush the power to commute sentences, but history will judge him harshly for using that power to benefit his own Vice President's Chief of Staff who was convicted of such a serious violation of law."

"The President's commutation of Scooter Libby's prison sentence does not serve justice, condones criminal conduct, and is a betrayal of trust of the American people.

"The President said he would hold accountable anyone involved in the Valerie Plame leak case. By his action today, the President shows his word is not to be believed. He has abandoned all sense of fairness when it comes to justice, he has failed to uphold the rule of law, and he has failed to hold his Administration accountable."

What's Shakin' on the Hill

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