Saturday, September 03, 2005

The Tierney of The Moronity

Watch as John Tierney once again tries to cram every conceivable facet of human existence into his tiny intellectual framework:

"Why is New Orleans in so much worse shape today than New York City was after the attacks on Sept. 11?

"The short answer is that New York was attacked by fire, not water."

And you thought New York City was attacked by terrorists.

Of course, if he wanted to address reality, the latest installment of Mr. T's bi-weekly exercise in intellectual onanism would have petered out before the third sentence.

If we took Tierney seriously -- and why should we start now -- then the country should have disbanded the military after 09/11/01 and let those interested in the protection of the Big Apple from fire form the Homeland Security Assurance Co. of New York, N.Y. Why should Montanans subsidize the protection of the big city fire-traps, since they've got nothing worth flying into? If New York Citian developers had to pony up for civil defense premiums, they'd stop building such gigantic targets. (And/or, as Tierney would have it, their insurance companies would pressure cities to enact stronger aircraft-resistant building codes -- apparently, it's bad for citizens to join together to demand government-enforced restrictions on property owners for the sake of public safety, but it's good for citizens to form corporations that demand government restrictions on property owners for the same purpose.)

The most bizarre aspect of the column is that Tierney didn't need to invoke 9/11 to make his dullwitted points; he just made himself look more foolish by trying to compare two entirely dissimilar tragedies.

Perhaps we should be grateful Tierney hasn't called upon his pale pal Steve Sailer to teach us the biological and anthropological lessons of Hurricane Katrina.


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