Thou Shalt Not Bear False Witness

Great minds think alike. Eugene Oregon at Demagogue read the same Ann Coulter column I did this morning and shot gaping holes in its bogus premise before the mid-morning coffee break, saving me a lot of work.

But I'd still like to make my own humble contribution.

Here's Coulter's second tale of Christian persecution, copied third-grade book report-style from a new David Limbaugh "book":

Thanks to the vigilance of an alert teacher at Lynn Lucas Middle School outside of Houston, two sisters carrying Bibles were prevented from bringing their vile material into a classroom. The teacher stopped the students at the classroom door and marched them to the principal's office. (Maybe it was just the sight of public school students carrying a book of any kind that set off alarm bells.) The sisters' mother was called and warned that the school intended to report her to Child Protective Services. When the mother arrived, the teacher threw the Bibles in the wastebasket, shouting, "This is garbage!"

In another display of tolerance at Lynn Lucas Middle School, school administrators snatched three students' books with covers displaying the Ten Commandments, ripped the covers off, threw them in the garbage, and told the students that the Ten Commandments constituted "hate speech." (Also, it would be insensitive to expose the Ten Commandments to students who had never been taught to count to 10.)

Ah ha ha.

Gee, I wonder why Ann didn't identify the "alert teacher" by name.

Perhaps its because, according to the Associated Press, the students who made the allegations, through a wingnut legal foundation, dropped the lawsuit in which they made the allegations.

WILLIS (AP) - A federal lawsuit accusing Willis school district teachers of confiscating and throwing away Bibles and ordering students to remove religious book covers has been dropped by the legal watchdog group that filed it.

District Superintendent Kay Karr said in a written statement Thursday the lawsuit was voluntarily withdrawn by Florida-based Liberty Counsel and that "students of Willis Independent School District have not been told they cannot bring Bibles to school, and Bibles were never thrown into the trash."

Mathew Staver, a lawyer with Liberty Counsel, said the lawsuit's withdrawal was an attempt to avoid a court battle and reach a mutually satisfying agreement between the parties involved.

The dismissal is confirmed by Laura "You Jews Let Me Down" Schlessinger, who wrote:

The lawsuit was recently dismissed as an attempt at a harmonious resolution -- so the children can return to school without fear of reoccurrence.

Yeah, right. People always dismiss their lawsuits so they can achieve a harmonious resolution. The dismissal gives them so much more leverage.

As a wise person once said, "Any fucking moron with a hundred and fifty bucks can file a 'ten million dollar lawsuit.'"

If I didn't know any better, I'd think Limbaugh just cut and pasted a bunch of b.s. from the internet and selling it to the chinless idiots who are still struggling with Tape 2 of Hooked on Phonics.