Stick A Fork In Him

Still, sadly, the rule of law in Florida is "only the first one is free."

To Replay The King

Spoiler alert

Why is this shocking at all?

MRC Killings

Jim Romensko reveals that Tim Graham is the Jeff Dunham to Brent Bozell's racist dummy: 

Two other people with ties to MRC confirmed that Graham is Bozell’s ghostwriter – and that Graham is not happy with the assignment.

“Tim just resents having to do it,” says a former employee.

Graham’s wife, too, is so angry about the arrangement that she refuses to attend Media Research Center events.

“She hates Bozell,” I’m told. 

I wouldn't put it past Timmy to tell Mrs. Graham that el-Brent forces him to watch MTV and Logo and The Real Housewives of New Jersey just so he can write Bozell's columns.   

I can understand why Timmy would want a bigger cut of the proceeds MRC makes off the rubes, but what person in his right mind would want to take credit for writing this:

Why can't leftists ever take responsibility for anything?

Since this band [Bad Religion] believes churches are a blight on society, it's unsurprising that 20 percent of their sales proceeds [for a Christmas CD] will go to suing the Catholic Church through the "Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests," a group as despicable as it is dishonest.

Yes, in el-Brent/Timmy's collective mind, there's nothing so despicable as rape victims, those lying little sluts.

Reagan Bull

Scott Walker has disqualified himself to hold any elective office, as revealed in his interview with John Hawkins of Right Wing News.

Walker is unfit to hold any office by virtue of allowing himself to be interviewed by John Hawkins of Right Wing News.

Update: Screamin' John Hawkins is throwing himself under the Walker bus on this one, according to Matt Lewis of The Daily Choler.  Further establishing my premise.  (No link to The Choler.)

Inbreeding Will Tell

Having devoured the last of Andy B.'s formidible corpse, the maggots are now going cannibalistic on each others' asses to keep themselves alive. The latest tale of Dolchstossing, according to The Daiily Choler, centers on unemployable shyster Ben Shapiro, who apparently was the last to latch onto Breitbart while the latter was nominally alive:

While Shapiro declined to talk for this piece, The Mirror is hearing numerous grumblings and stories of serious hardship about how difficult life is there since the death of their beloved leader Andrew Breitbart. Some current and former employees are pained by some of the things they see happening there, bizarre, inexplicable directives and childish grudges for example, and other things they say Breitbart never would have tolerated.

As many already know, Dana Loesch, who was one of Breitbart’s closest cohorts, filed a $75k lawsuit against the company in late 2012 because she claimed execs wouldn’t let her out of her contract and badmouthed her to other suitors interested in hiring her. She settled with Breitbart News in July of 2013. She now works for Glenn Beck over at TheBlaze.

Internally, the general feeling was that once Shapiro started TruthRevolt, the right-wing media watchdog site, that he’d be venturing over there full time and leaving Breitbart in the dust. But Breitbart has managed to keep him on in a limited capacity that allows him to go full-time at TruthRevolt as well as retain a position at Breitbart News.

(sic -- All shitty writing (c) Betsy Rothstein, 2014)


Yes, if there's anything the world needs, it's another shitty right-wing media watchdog site to compete with NewsBustards, mrc.org, Mediaite, Depends Media, Twanky and Breitbart.com's own Big Journaljism.  It seems Shapiro, like every hack on the right, wants to stay wrapped up in Breitbart's pelt while keeping Breitbart's gelt solely to himself. 

But how can Brietbart.com continue to work with Benjy when he gives TruthRevolt the exclusive on "NBC Commentator's Wardrobe Shows Support for LGBT"?  (Currently the most-viewed story on The Wide World of Splutter.)

One cannot help but picture The Virgin Ben and Joel Pollack storming off to their respective rooms, slamming their respective doors and wailing, "I hate him! I hate him! I hate him!" into their respective well-loved blue Snuggles -- all while speed-dialing Betsy Rothstein.

Warning: Link to The Daily Choler.

Update:  While the wingnutosphere provides 24/7 coverage of Benjy's butthurt, a promising real news website is launched.

Comedy Is Tragedy Plus Bad Taste

link

C(RED)it Fraud

With all the wingnut self-wetting about a Coca-Cola  commercial aired last night, most people seem to have overlooked the 800 millon pound convicted fraudster in the digital room:

(Reuters) - The U.S. government has raised the amount it is seeking in penalties from Bank of America Corp (BAC.N) to $2.1 billion after a jury found the bank was liable for fraud over defective mortgages sold by its Countrywide unit.

The request in a court filing late on Wednesday was based on gross revenue generated by the fraud, the government said. The Justice Department had previously asked for $863.6 million.

The initial request was based on gross losses it said government-sponsored mortgage finance companies Fannie Mae (FNMA.OB) and Freddie Mac (FMCC.OB) incurred on loans purchased from Countrywide Financial Corp in 2007 and 2008.

How about some free download cash for the victims of Bank of America, Bank of America?  You could buy 525 Super Bowl ads with the cash earned from homeowners you fucked over.

(Yes, I know civil liability isn't a criminal conviction. I speak rhetorically.)  

Roger Beats The Spread

My Super Bowl prediction -- that the Super Bowl wouldn't be worth watching -- was eerily prescient.

By Their Words Ye Shall Know Them

The Big Pussy Administration delivers the new standard for judging someone's credibility:

“He was publicly accused by his high school social studies teacher of deceptive behavior.”

We should give Big Pussy the benefit of the doubt and judge him by the same standard. 

Autoerotcorrect

A lot of people doing a Google search for "Althouse" are going to be terribly disappointed.

Unless they really really enjoy comments by blithering old male idiots.

Marty Peretz Walks Into A Bar .... Hearing

Somehow, this wasn't helpful:

Martin Peretz, who owned and managed The New Republic at the time of the fabrications, testified on Glass's behalf and had developed a charitable view of his misconduct by the time of the California State Bar hearing. He blamed himself and, even more, the magazine's editors for encouraging Glass to write zany, shocking articles and for failing to recognize the improbability of some of Glass's stories. He found the harm of the scandal to the magazine to be minimal. He had renewed social contact with Glass in the past few years and believed that Glass had been harshly treated. He would not rule out hiring Glass again as a journalist.  He explained that in his experience as a professor “[t]he most brilliant students plagiarize,” complaining to the Committee‟s counsel, “I actually find your pursuing him an act of stalking.”

Grand Old Police Blotter: D'Souza P'Alooza Edition

The Dinesh D'Souza stupidity spree just keeps getting better. Turns out the strawd'onors were not married to each other. One was "other woman" in D'Souza's life and pants, the other was an employee of D'Souza (and possibly of his employer, The King's College).  

That's right, D'Souza's bit on the side was "donating" dollars to D'Souza's college pal in the name of the husband she was cuckolding, according to Gawker:

On August 30, 2012, according to a quarterly report filed two months later, the Long campaign received a $10,000 donation under the name of [Denise Odie] Joseph’s husband. On the same day, the campaign received another $10,000 donation, under [personal assistant Tyler] Vawser’s name. Campaign finance law caps individual contributions at $5,000, so both donations were flagged by Long’s treasurer for “reattribution/redesignation.” (By then D’Souza and his wife Dixie had both contributed the maximum amount to Long’s campaign.)

Vawser’s $10,000 donation was never split up or refunded, according to subsequent FEC filings. But on October 22, 2012—a week after D’Souza’s affair with Joseph scandalized the evangelical community and D’Souza resigned his presidency at The King’s College—Long’s treasurer “reattributed” $5,000 of Louis Joseph’s original donation to Denise Joseph, leaving Louis with an identical $5,000 contribution. (It's not clear from the filings why Joseph received a post-election refund for $5,000—a perfectly legal amount of money.)

So while D'Souza was married, he gave his mistress $5K to give to third woman or he told his mistress to give the third woman $5K with a promise of repayment. In the name of her chump hubby.

Worse than D'Souza's scummy relationship is the fact that he involved his employee in his crimes.  

Jesus would totally do that.  

Let's Just Declare Intellectual Bankruptcy and Shut This Whole Thing Down

I hate to judge a book by its cover, but ...

Henry David Thoreau leaves the seclusion of Walden Pond to help investigate a series of murders in the first in B. B. Oak's fascinating new historical mystery series, set against the bucolic backdrop of 19th century New England.

Wha --

Angered by the injustice, Adam and his lovely cousin Julia Bell agree to assist Thoreau in investigating. Adam notes in his new friend all the makings of a great detective—an encyclopedic knowledge of the natural world, uncanny observational skills, a sharp instinct for detecting human foibles. As the case progresses, the mysteries only deepen and there is no mistaking the brutal slaying of a womanizing army captain as anything other than the coldest murder. Journeying from their tranquil village to Boston’s most disreputable district, they gradually uncover the monstrous truth -- even while a vicious killer prepares to end their inquiry for good.

In the sequel, "Frazer Is Killed," Thoreau teams up with his former lover, Union super-spy Emily Dickinson, in a race against time to discover the identity of the shadowy Southerner known only as "Booth."

The Albommies

I'm thinking of doing, when the NCAA b-ball tourney time comes around, a bracket with the 64 worst contemporary American popular fiction authors. The only problem will be narrowing it down.

Googlenacht

Steve M. reports on the Re-Rise of Fascism in Baghdad-by-the-Bay, complete with an attack on S.F.'s own Stalin (Danielle).

Grand Old Police Blotter: Long Dongs D'Souza Edition

The key prosecution witness in the felony campaign law violation case against ladies man Dinesh D'Souza is the beneficiary of his largess:

[Wendy] Long, an old friend of D'Souza's from their Dartmouth days, will testify against him at trial, prosecutor Carrie Cohen told Judge Richard Berman at the "Roots of Obama's Rage" author's arraignment.

Long "informed the government that Mr. D'Souza lied to her about the source of those donations," Cohen said.

She said D'Souza had exceeded campaign contribution limits by giving her cash through two of his married friends.

Here's where it gets interesting. 

"One worked with him and the other lived with him," Cohen said.

This isn't particularly clear.  Were the friends married to each other?  If so, why was one was living with D'Souza?  Where was the girlfriend Opie living?  Sounds kinky.

They each donated $10,000 to Long and behalf of themselves and their spouses — and then D'Souza repaid them in cash a "one or two days later," Cohen said.

Individual donations are supposed to be capped at $5,000. The two straw donors have given witness statements to the feds, and will also testify against D'Souza at trial, Cohen said.

The line to throw D'Souza under the bus is a long one. 

D'Souza's high-powered lawyer, Benjamin Brafman, said he wasn't challenging most of Cohen's facts — but he was challenging her conclusion that what his client did was criminal.

"There was no 'quid pro quo' in this case," Brafman said, and the director "did not act with any corrupt or criminal intent whatsoever."

"At worse, this was an act of misguided friendship by D'Souza," he said.

High-powered doesn't guarantee high value, it seems. Brafman's got nothing.

D’Souza was released on $500,000 bond.

Or 100 illegal campaign contributions bond, as D'Souza calls it.

Meanwhile, D'Souza's suckers supporters are busy dreaming up left-wing conspiracies to explain the prosecution. I'm sure they'll zip back up once they learn that D'Souza was gift-wrapped for the feds by a former law clerk for Clarence "Gin and Pubes" Thomas.

Between the legal fees and fines, D'Souza's supporters suckers are going to pay through the nose for this caper.  Shame they can do his prison time for him. 

Type 2 Diabetes Daddy Schools The B****es

Ted Nugent's opening act unveils the G.O.P.'s grand campaign to court women voters: 

The Democrat Party platform appeals to whores.  You're not a stupid whore, are you?

Update:  What he said. 

Grand Old Police Blotter: Long D'Ong D'Souza Edition

Whenever two or more are gathered in His name, it's a criminal conspiracy. Leading Christian criminal Dinesh D'Souza, last seen sexing up a woman other than his wife, has now been nailed as tthe ringleader of a criminal enterprise.

Federal prosecutors in Manhattan said that Mr. D’Souza encouraged others to give $20,000 to a Senate candidate and reimbursed them for the donations. Election law prohibits such arrangements and caps donations at $5,000 per donor to any one candidate.

The Senate candidate was not identified in the indictment. Mr. D’Souza donated to only one federal candidate in 2012, giving $5,000 toWendy Long, a New York Republican who lost her challenge to Senator Kirsten E. Gillibrand, a Democrat.

“Mr. D’Souza did not act with any corrupt or criminal intent whatsoever,” his lawyer, Benjamin Brafman, said in a statement. “He and the candidate have been friends since their college days, and at most, this was an act of misguided friendship by D’Souza.”

It's not a crime if you're friends, and the 5K re-payments to the strawdonors were just a coincidence. 

D'Souza and Long were last in the news together in their roles as the trustees of an anti-Semitic college newspaper.  If he's convicted, maybe he can join a Neo-Nazi prison gang.

It's Also Good News For John McCain

Meeeegan McArdle claims she won one of those debates where you "win" the debate by planting losers in the audience who will lie and claim they changed their position to your side in the course of two hours.  In truth, McArdle's side lost the debate, 59 to 32 percent.  But the libertarian half-wit claims victory by virtue of decreasing by 16 percent the total votes against her. (That's how Mitt Romney became our 46th President, dont'cha know?)

No doubt the McArdle trophy case is full of participation ribbons, stretched out of shape during McArdle's efforts to pry them from their bearers.

And then there's this:

My favorite moment from the debate, and I’m obviously biased, occurred when McArdle denied that she philosophically opposes national health insurance, prompting me to quote the headline of this 2009 McArdle column, “Why I Oppose National Health Care.”

Lying to achieve "victory," The oldest libertarian trick in The Fountainhead.   

Fear of Plowing

What the zipless fuck?

They largely ignored the well-heeled Upper East Side until nearly 5 inches fell — according to the city’s PlowNYC Web site — and by then, buses were stranded and people could barely cross the streets.

...

 “The Upper East Side did not vote for [de Blasio],” said lifelong resident Molly Jong Fast, daughter of famed novelist Erica Jong.

She said de Blasio “is trying to get us back.”

Not enough coddling for you, Molly?

A few inches of powder destroys one's self-consciousness, it seems:

But it’s hardly the Upper East Side she knew growing up, says Jong-Fast, who, though now married to an investment banker, prefers that people be “self-conscious about their wealth, especially in these times.” Dressed in black the other day, with no makeup, bangles or earrings, she looked more downtown than up.

Then again, she says, when she grew up — with bohemian-writer parents in a hot-pink townhouse on 94th Street — money wasn’t something you flaunted.

While they were upper-middle-class and sent little Molly to private school, they didn’t dispatch her there by limo, as some parents did.

“They liked to make fun of rich people,” she says of her mom, dad and stepdad. “Maybe they were jealous!”

Or maybe Mom wasn't scared of five inches.