Roger's Reader Participation

The New York Post is reporting than Ann Coulter's jaw is broken and has been wired shut.

It would be irresponsible for you not to speculate what led to this series of unfortunate events.

Of course, every cloud has its silver lining:

DON'T consume alcohol. Perhaps you were thinking that you could cheat, but there is a reason they put this on your recovery form. On your all-liquid diet, alcohol is a quick ticket to dehydration and you'll feel the effect within minutes. It will also send you running to the nearest restroom (if you're lucky enough to find one nearby!).

When one orifice closes ....