Saturday, March 04, 2006

Sad news. Linda Smith of BBC Radio 4's News Quiz has died of ovarian cancer. She was 48.

You can listen to some of her work here.

The 2005 Koufax Awards

Voting has opened.

I'll be blogging them in real time too.

I hate to sound intolerant, but I have no sympathy, no empathy and no use for any of the people in this article.
A revolution in the blogging arts

In order to make up for the lack of content lately, I've invented a concept that will revolutionize blogging as we know it. It involves blogging a live event as it happens. I call it: blogging in real time. As far as I can tell, it's never been done.

This is going to be big, my friends. Big!

To start out slowly, I'm going to blog-in-real-time (or "birt") Sunday night's Oscar telecast. The Oscars may seem far afield from this blog's core mission -- whatever that is. But every "C" list wingnut has offered a curdled opinion on the proceedings. Every one. Every one. etc. (Warning: Links contain spoilers. And whiners.) el-Bent Bozell already has the baby oil, the baby wipes and the baby defibrillator at his bedside in case anything homosexual wins. So there is a tie-in.

What will make this event even more revolutionary is that I haven't seen a single 2005 movie, either in theaters or on DVD. That's at least two less than TBogg. I am less qualified to have an opinion on 2005 films than anyone on any subject, with the exception of Michelle Malkin on any subject.

Come Sunday night, Roger Ailes will be the place to be for cineastry. (Hey, that's a new word!) The Governor's Ball will be unattended, except for Mickey Kaus begging for a job of some sort, and Swifty Lazar's no longer with us. The Vanity Fair party was canceled due to Prop. 65 violations.

For added excitement, I'm going to use the word Oscars without the permission of AMPAS. Bite me, AMPAS!

Don't miss it.

Friday, March 03, 2006

Once again my parents have failed me:

WASHINGTON (Dow Jones/AP) - The New York Times Co. paid Chairman Arthur Sulzberger Jr. a salary and bonus of $1.6 million for 2005.

The New York-based media company also said he received options on 150,000 shares and got a grant of restricted stock units valued at $817,500.

That works out $25,000 per worthless David Brooks column, or $2.00 per Judy Miller-martyr reference. Or half the fees of Floyd Abrams and Bill Bennett.

Bad Column Writing

Can one graduate from Harvard with the writing skills of Kaye Grogan? Michael Kalin makes the case:

Throughout his formal education, Goldberg stayed up-to-date on national politics through nightly coverage on "The Daily Show" and even led a petition to protest the genocide in Darfur.

Led a petition?

The tragedy of this portrait is not that investment banking corrupts young souls (although one could argue otherwise), but rather that the students who abandon politics out of a naive self-consciousness often represent our country's most idealistic minds.

That's Abe Rosenthal bad!

Observers since the days of de Tocqueville have often remarked about America's unique dissociation between politicians and citizens of "outstanding character."

You just can't shut those observers up once they get started on that topic.

Although Stewart's comedic shticks may thus earn him some laughs Sunday at the Oscars, his routine will certainly not match the impact of his greatest irony: Jon Stewart undermines any remaining earnestness that liberals in America might still possess.

I hate it when shticks undermine earnestness.

Stewart's daily dose of political parody characterized by asinine alliteration leads to a "holier than art thou" attitude toward our national leaders.

Hmmmm... this almost sounds like a parody.

Of a Stanford grad.

Sadly, No! has more.

Update: One of the commenters at Sadly, No! already made the Grogan comparison. Advantage: Commentosphere!

I Bought It On (R)Bay!

The U.S. Department of Justice has announced the opening of the largest internet auction site in history. The site is called (R)Bay, and it will feature auctions of the ill-gotten gains of convicted Republicans.

Randy "Duke" Cunningham's ill-gotten French antique commodes and other furnishings will be auctioned off in three weeks, authorities said yesterday.

The commodes -- a type of chest of drawers -- drew snickers from late-night comedians when the former congressman pleaded guilty to conspiracy and tax evasion last fall.

The furnishings were among the more than $2.4 million in bribes that the former congressman admitted taking from defense contractors.

Dozens of pieces of furniture and rugs that once stuffed his Arlington, Va., condominium and later were moved into Cunningham's Rancho Santa Fe mansion were turned over to the government as part of his guilty plea.

They are scheduled to be auctioned off March 23 at a warehouse in Rancho Dominguez, near Long Beach, with prospective buyers able to preview them two days earlier and on the Internet now.

"The only people who are restricted from bidding on this are Congressman Cunningham or anyone acting on his behalf or any of the other defendants," said Britney Sheehan, a spokeswoman for auctioneer EG&G Technical Services.

Although experts have estimated the value of the items, she said she couldn't reveal that because she didn't want it to affect bidding.

The proceeds will go to the agencies that investigated Cunningham. They are the FBI, the Internal Revenue Service Criminal Investigation branch and the Defense Criminal Investigative Service.

Bidding on the Ney and DeLay collections begins later this spring.

(And coming this fall to RNCAmerica: "Plea Bargain Hunt," "Graft In The Attic" and "The Hammer Under The Hammer.")

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Fair Enough

Jack Shafer says The New Republic has become Joe Lieberman Weekly. Shafer appears to mean it as a compliment.

I think I'd rather subscribe to The New Lamont.

Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Kneel and Moon

It's the end times. Dogs and Santorums, living together in sin. Cliff Kincaid of Accuracy in Media linking to John Gorenfeld. Cliffie writes:

The skirting of the law has enabled critics of the deal, such as Lou Dobbs of CNN, to suggest that Bush family ties to the UAE are involved. CNN reporter Christine Romans did a report on Dobbs' show alleging that the President's brother, Neil Bush, has reportedly received funding for his educational software company from UAE investors. Neil Bush, however, is a loose cannon in the Bush family, and recently showed up on a tour with controversial Korean cult leader Sun Myung Moon after going through a messy divorce. It's hard to believe that this black sheep of the Bush family would have that much influence. If there is a connection between Neil Bush and the deal, the controversy could quickly turn into "Portgate."
(Link to Gorenfeld's alternet article in original.)

The laughable premise here is Cliffie's suggestion that Kneel is the only Bush with ties to Moon. Ha!

The Nation Speaks As One

"Miserable failure," it says:

Mr. Bush's overall job rating has fallen to 34 percent, down from 42 percent last month. Fifty-nine percent disapprove of the job the president is doing.

For the first time in this poll, most Americans say the president does not care much about people like themselves. Fifty-one percent now think he doesn't care, compared to 47 percent last fall.

Just 30 percent approve of how Mr. Bush is handling the Iraq war, another all-time low.

By two to one, the poll finds Americans think U.S. efforts to bring stability to Iraq are going badly -- the worst assessment yet of progress in Iraq.

Even on fighting terrorism, which has long been a strong suit for Mr. Bush, his ratings dropped lower than ever. Half of Americans say they disapprove of how he's handling the war on terror, while 43 percent approve.
On the bright side, over 80 percent of al-Qaeda members approve of Bush's handling of the war on terror.

And there's good news for Dead-Eye Dick:

In a bright spot for the administration, most Americans appeared to have heard enough about Vice President Dick Cheney's hunting accident.

And this:

Still, the incident appears to have made the public's already negative view of Cheney a more so [sic]. Just 18 percent said they had a favorable view of the vice president, down from 23 percent in January.

The Dick is still more popular with the public than pedophiles and Tom DeLay. So that's encouraging.

My favorite bit of William F. Buckley's ballyhooed column on the miserable failure's miserable failure.

"It would not be surprising to learn from an anonymously cited American soldier that he can understand why Saddam Hussein was needed to keep the Sunnis and the Shiites from each others' throats."

Buckley lacks the balls to attribute that opinion to himself, so he puts the words in the mouth of a hypothetical soldier. And tortures the language to do so. The truth is, it wouldn't be noteworthy to learn of a solider having such an opinion. (Nor can you learn a fact from an opinion.) But if any serviceman or woman expressed that belief, the NR crowd would demand the punishment of that soldier for criticizing the Commander-in-Chief.

Go ahead Bill, say "I understand why Saddam Hussein was needed to keep the Sunnis and Shiites from each others' throats." Don't be such a coward your whole life.

Sunday, February 26, 2006

Checking out NewsMeat for other famous people who have made party-directed political contributions, we see the following:

Exclusively Democratic:

Sherwood Schwartz (over 125k)
Christie Brinkley
Michael Douglas
Michael Crichton
Bob Saget
Albert Brooks
Roy Horn
Ron Silver
Harold Ramis
Nancy Sinatra

Exclusively Republican:

Bob Barker
Sammy Hagar
Dean Koontz
Bobby Knight
John Elway
Alex Rodriguez
Mario Andretti
Al Michaels
Curt Gowdy
"Dr." Phil
Wink Martindale
Vince McMahon
Lou Pearlman
Merv Griffin
Jack Abramoff
7,100:1 Pro-Republican Ratio
Steve Forbes (The sole D recipient was named Forbes)

Nader Supporters:

Noam Chomsky
Danny Goldberg
Ben Stein
Shorter Cathy Seipp: Little faggot bookstore clerks need to learn their place and show deference to normal people for the freedom we allow them.

The original:

Strangest of all is the scenario of such a person disliking an author for defending Western civilization against radical Islam -- when one of the first things those poor, persecuted Islamists would do, if they ever (Allah forbid) came to power in the United States, is crush suspected homosexuals like him beneath walls.

Saturday, February 25, 2006

A moron says what?

"If ricin was packed into a roll of quarters unknowingly,... Wouldn't you think that would be considered a terrorist act?"
Geez O'Petes! Who or what do I have to screw to get a book deal?

What's next, Kaye Grogan's Hands Off My Caftan, PETA?

Don Knotts (1924-2006)

Don Knotts died Friday night in Beverly Hills of pulmonary and respiratory complications. He was 81.

The actor, who played landlord Mr. Furley on TV's Three's Company, won five Emmys in the 1960s for his portrayal of deputy Barney Fife on The Andy Griffith Show.

Former costar Andy Griffith was at Knotts's bedside when he died at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center, as were his third wife, Francie, and his children, Thomas and Karen.

I always liked Don.

(Unnecessary political tie-in. This too.)

Roger Reviews: The Professors

I was at Borders today and spotted Crazy Davy Horowitz's latest tome, The Professors. I spent a little bit of time scanning it, but don't have a laptop so I couldn't make detailed notes. Thus, the following is from memory.

From what I gleaned, many of the professors on the list were guilty of criticizing Bush and his war in Iran or saying something offensive (to Davy) about 9/11, the U.S. or Israel. Having a history with the Black Panthers and/or being a 60s radical are also a big no-nos, unless you're the author of the book. Teaching queer theory or feminism or black history is beyond the pasty pundit's pale. And I didn't see a lot of discussion about what actually transpired in the professors' classrooms, although there were a few references to syllabi and test questions.

A few of the alleged quotes from the profs were genuinely distasteful, but a lot more seemed to be selectively edited and many more than that seemed right on the money.

As I am unfamiliar with many of these professors or their alleged quotes, it's hard to tell how accurate the book is. The endnotes are often worthless, referencing an entire book without a page cite or citing to one of Crazy D's earlier books rather than an original source. (Not that I'd waste my time checking the cites.)

One example I am familiar with makes me suspicious about the accuracy of the entire book. In "his" piece on Orville Schell, Dean of the Berkeley J-School, Crazy Davy tells how the U.C. search committee refused to even interview an unnamed "qualified conservative" candidate for the position that went to Schell. Passing over the qualified conservative led to a lawsuit against U.C. by Crazy Davy's Individual Rights Foundation, until the qualified conservative bailed on the lawsuit.

Of course, that tale has nothing to do with Schell's qualifications for the job, but Davy's got pages to fill. But why doesn't Davy name the qualified conservative? Because that man is Michael Savage, the lunatic racist who even Bobo Brooks calls a "radio hatemonger." Savage isn't qualified to clean the crappers in the Bear's Lair.

If the rest of Horowitz's book is as dishonest as that particular passage, then ... well, really, it's nothing new.

The book also has Regnery hallmark of shoddy editing. Dinesh d'Souza is identified as "Dinesh n'tsouza" and the phrase "captured Taliban fighters who were captured...." is used. In one of the pieces, Crazy D refers to himself in the third person, as if someone else had written the entry. I expect it will be a few months before stacks of The Professors sit next to stacks of Bernie Goldberg's Arrogance, going unsold at $3.99.

Rating: No Stars

Retarded

Here's a quote to celebrate the 50th Anniversary of National Review:

"In the Deep South the Negroes are, by comparison with the whites, retarded. . . . Leadership in the South, then, quite properly, rests in white hands. Upon the white population this fact imposes moral obligations of paternalism, patience, protection, devotion, sacrifice."

How little has changed.

(via George Fwill, of all people.)

Here's some more Klanuttery from today's Moonie Times:

It is just as well Harriet Beecher Stowe knew nothing about Mary Chesnut.

The child of fervently puritanical parents and driven by her abolitionist beliefs to write "Uncle Tom's Cabin," Stowe created an incredibly successful and influential novel although she had no firsthand knowledge of her subject. It was serialized in the National Era in 1851, in the year before it appeared in book form.

Stowe was convinced that all slaveholders were brutish oppressors (as some undoubtedly were), but what would she have made of Mary Boykin Miller, who as a young girl taught slaves on two plantations to read and write although this was strictly forbidden in South Carolina? Both she and the man she married were opposed to slavery.

Yes, the Chesnuts were so opposed to slavery that they taught the slaves they owned to read.

Because I'm opposed to violence, I'll drive Peter Cliffe to the hospital after I beat the shit out of him. And then I'll do it again.

Hyatt Riot

Looking for an upscale space for your next Klan rally, Stormfront soiree or MalkinCon? Hyatt hotels has got a deal for you!

McLEAN, Va. -- The Hyatt hotel chain has come under fire for agreeing to host a conference this weekend sponsored by a white supremacist group.

The conference in the Washington suburb of Herndon is sponsored by the Oakton, Va.-based New Century Foundation, whose leader says the white race is losing its identity in the United States because of multiculturalism and immigration.
...

Hyatt spokeswoman Lori Armon said the opinions of those at the conference do not necessarily reflect those of the Hyatt Corp. "However, we do not discriminate against any of our guests or organizations with which our guests are affiliated," she said.

That's mighty white of you, Lor. I guess that's what Hyatt calls diversity.

The event promises to be the largest ever -- and that's just counting the contingent from the Moonie Times.

The keynoter at this year's event will be Charles Krauthammer, who will speak on "The White Man's Burden, The White Man's Solution."

(Tnanks to a reader for the tip.)

Friday, February 24, 2006

Interesting campaign for the film version of Chris "Baby Daddy" Buckley's comic novel, Thank You For Smoking.

One of the lame gimmicks at the film's website is a series of "Great Moments In Spin" e-cards, including the following one:

There's also a banner ad running that reads: "President Bush says he's presently surprised by how good New Orleans looks these days. That's coming from the man who thinks things look great in Iraq too."

Certainly these are cynical uses of current events to promote a film rather than a sincere condemnation of Bush's high crimes, foreign and domestic. (And it worked, since I mentioned the film.) If anything, the campaign's disrespectful of the victims of Bush's crimes.

But it's certainly not an example of liberal Hollywood. The film's directed by the son of Ahnold apologist Ivan Reitman (making it an all-nepotism production). And the promoters include a Clinton gag card as well.

One might expect the Bush part of the ad campaign to be met with squeals of horror from the phony outrage pimps on the Fox News Channel, but the film's producer is Fox Searchlight. And with Ol' Dirty Buckley's ties to the project, Cousin Itt Bozell will be gagged as well. (I also see Dennis Miller's got a bit part "as himself," portraying an unfunny talk host.) Expect not a peep from the pimps.

Delusions of Persecution

The voices in Peggy Noonan's head are cross...and they're going to make Peggy pay.

Yesterday, TBogg linked to Peggy Noonan's latest self-pitiful exercise in nailing herself to the cross, in which all the nasty lumpenfolk bruised Old Peg's sensitive feelings by "yelling" at her. But the abuse was all in her broken head.

Check out Peg's choices of verbs and adverbs: "curtly," "barked," "yelled at," "yelling," "yelled," "snap," "impatiently," "yelling," "yelling," "yells," "shouts," "twisted in anger." I understand that everything sounds louder and everyone seems meaner when you've got a constant hangover and you're jonesing for another cig, Peggy, but those people are just doing their jobs.

Now read the article with Peg's victimhood omitted:

A woman in an airport security uniform patrolled on the left, professionally instructing us to move to the right. A cleaning crew on the right requested, "Coming through, move please!" We stood nervously wherever we wouldn't be in the way. No one tried to help us, to calm the fears of those about to miss their flights. There was a lot of requests intended to expedite the process -- "I need your ID open and faced forward! No, you must put that in the bin!"

I know it's a bitch when janitors speak to you without leave and you've got to queue with the unwashed who so brutally ignored your last book, but you've got to face the fact that air travel can't be delivered to you like a case of Ancient Age.

So how do I know for a fact that every single working peon in two airports wasn't rude to Old Peg? The same way I know that Holy Dolphins aren't possessed to perform miracles on command.

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Konservative Komedy Korner

Over at Clownhall.com, Hollywood insider Cheryl Felicia Rhoads is touting the comedy stylings of far-right funnyman Evan Sayet. Sayet has been tapped to headline at David Horowitz's rescheduled Restoration Weekend, where he will "entertain the likes of Michael Barone, Tammy Bruce and Phyllis Chesler to name just a few."

Sayet's "also a popular blogger and lecturer" (who isn't!) and he's generous enough to share some of his "A" material on the 'net.

Here's Evan on the Moslem:

The folks at the Times, et al, know that if the people actually saw the silly, innocuous cartoons then the Moslem would be, yet again, exposed as exceptionally dangerous and willing to commit the most exceptional of crimes because of their exceptional viciousness. This cannot be allowed. And THIS is the reason the Antique Media refuses to provide their readers/viewers with salient and vital information.

It's the funny because its the true.

Evan on the Demonrats:

Democrats ALWAYS Side With Evil/Wrong and Failed

If you don't know the Democrats' position on any particular issue simply ask yourself "what's the worst option" and that will be the Democrats'.

Anything that's successful -- Wal-Mart, Israel, America, etc. -- they are against. Anything that is failed -- Tookie Williams, ebonics, the Palestinians -- they are for.

Evan could use a few writing tips from ebonics; but at least he's cutting-edge topical.

Evan on the destruction of civilization:

This idea of "living for today" is what is behind the left's arguments for homosexual marriage -- something that may well destroy civilization TOMORROW but for today, well, it feels good. And it explains why the left's ideological brethren in France would refuse to get up from their Chablis to go check on their parents during a heatwave that saw 15,000 of their moms and dads, grandmas and grandpas suffocate to death two summers ago.

Zing!

Why is Evan only charging $10 a head for this comedy gold? And why isn't he on CNBC?

Evan on the lighter side of death:

(In fairness, while the socialists in places like Canada and France have offered not a single scientific advancement of note in a long, long time, there are American scientists whose computer models suggest that one is expected by around the turn of the twenty-fourth century -- about the same time that the first person is expected to die from second-hand smoke and the first non-intravenous drug-using heterosexual in the Western World is expected to contract AIDS.)

I'd like to see Jerry Seinfeld or Jon Stewart get as many laughs out of a "die, fags" routine.

Rhoads informs us that "the formerly liberal Sayet switched his political allegiances after September 11th, 2001." Yes, Sayet's another el-Simon wingnut: "I used to consider myself a Democrat, but thanks to 9/11, I'm outraged by Chappaquiddick."

But Evan's not just a comedian, he's an historian too:

From the light bulb to the television, from the personal computer to the internet, virtually every scientific innovation of the last century has come from the religious folks in America. If it were up to the French, the Swedes or the Spanish the "enlightened" would quite literally still be sitting in the dark.

Or maybe that's part of his comedy routine; I'm not sure.

I hope Crazy Davy Horowitz, Michael Barone and Tammy Bruce enjoy Sayet's gags about dying faggots and Frogs, dem illiterate Negroids and the bloodthirsty Moslem race. The culture wars will still be there to fight after the warm glow of laughter fades away.

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

All The Rage

This David Ignatius column makes me so mad that I can't see straight:

A second explanation of the connectedness paradox comes from Charles M. McLean, who runs a trend-analysis company called Denver Research Group Inc....

McLean argues that the Internet is a "rage enabler." By providing instant, persistent, real-time stimuli, the new technology takes anger to a higher level. "Rage needs to be fed or stimulated continually to build or maintain it," he explains. The Internet provides that instantaneous, persistent poke in the eye. What's more, it provides an environment in which enraged people can gather at cause-centered Web sites and make themselves even angrier. The technology, McLean notes, "eliminates the opportunity for filtering or rage-dissipating communications to intrude." I think McLean is right. And you don't have to travel to Cairo to see how the Internet fuels rage and poisons reasoned debate. Just take a tour of the American blogosphere.

The connected world is inescapable, like the global economy itself. But if we can begin to understand how it undermines political stability -- how it can separate elites from masses, and how it can enhance rage rather than reason -- then perhaps we will have a better chance of restabilizing a very disorderly world.

Oh, for the good old days -- pre-1990s -- a time when our sectarian wars and riots and lynchings and genocides were civilized affairs, based on pure, sweet reason. Oh, paradise lost!

I'd like to apologize personally to David Ignatius and Tom Friedman and Francis Fukuyama and Thomas P.M. Barnett and, most of all, to Charles M. McLean, who runs a trend-analysis company called Denver Research Group Inc., for coarsening the discourse. It was wrong of me to think that my opinions might be worth consideration even though I knew I didn't have a book contract. Clearly, it was my rage that blinded me to the fact that I was poisoning reasoned debate and undermining political stability and separating elites from masses.

And I was such a nice fellow before October 2002; really, I was.

Let the healing begin.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Face Time

An inbred hillbilly who pretends he's not a conservative writes:

"If you want to start on that, you might take a look at PorkBusters Hall of Shame Grand Prize Winner Ted Stevens (R-AK) and ask if he's the best face for the Republican Party. Because right now, he is the face of the Republican Party."

(Italics in original, no link to the inbred hillbilly.)

Yes, neither the President of the United States nor the Vice President nor the Senate Majority Leader nor the Speaker of the House nor the House Majority Leader nor the soon-to-be-convicted former House Majority Leader is the face of the Republican Party. The face of the Republican Party is a senator from Alaska whose face and name wouldn't be recognized by 1 out of 20 Americans.

But what else would you expect from a fake libertarian who earns his daily bread and subsidizes his blog by sucking at the public teat?

All Access Bribe Pass

I saw Josh Marshall's link to this article concerning the Abramoff/Mahathir Mohamad connection about a hour and 15 minutes ago, and was going to comment on the Malaysian regime's ties to Ed Feulner and the Whoritage Foundation.

But Matt Yglesias and Atrios already have it covered.

The questions remain: How much of the $1.2 million made it into White House hands, and whose hands?

More Feulner fun here.

Bonus Fun:: A link to a different version of the A.P. article is up at Whoritage's purported spin-off, Clownhall.com. (And dig the Freudian reference to "two confessional trips to Malaysia.") I wonder how long it will take Clownhall to scrub that link.

David Irving and Deborah Howell: Separated at Birth

David Irving pleads guilty, concedes 'I made a mistake'

Monday, February 20, 2006

Kausphobes

Mickey Kaus goes bobbing for apples at his favorite racist bulletin board, Lucianne.com, and surfaces with two pet hates clenched between his teeth.

The stunted blogger writes:

Harmonic convergence of right-wing isssues: Gay marriage becomes immigration loophole in UK. ... "Immigrants face less rigorous tests if they seek to gain British citizenship through a civil partnership," notes the Sunday Times--though I doubt the additional "consummation" requirement for heteros is rigorously enforced. ... Isn't the problem simply that a gay-union loophole multiplies the number of possibilities for sham marriages (and probably by more than a factor of 2, because it's less of a psychological effort for heteros to room with a same-sex pal for two years than to feign marriage with an opposite-sex pal)? ... [via Lucianne] 12:23 P.M.

Wasn't it just last week that the diminutive one was, in his latest slam of Brokeback Mountain, telling us how all straight-thinking heterosexual straights like himself were filled with innate revulsion for all things gay?

If you think the visceral straight male reaction against male homosexual sex has effectively disappeared--look at Plano, etc.--you won't spend a lot of time trying to figure out the possible deep-seated, even innate, sources of resistance to liberalization, and you'll tend to be surprised and baffled by their persistence.

Of course, Kaus blows hot and cold on his fascination for the gay. Days earlier he was chastizing the Los Angeles Times for leaving out the details of a same-sex encounter between a bisexual film director and a cop:

Why We Are Still Not Willing to Pay 50 cents for the Los Angeles Times in Los Angeles: The director of the James Bond movie "Die Another Day,"--as well as "XXX: State of the Union," "Mulholland Falls," and "Once Were Warriors"--is arrested "after allegedly dressing as a woman and offering sex to an undercover Los Angeles police officer in exchange for money." (Apparently he's selling, not buying!) The mighty local monopoly paper gives it ... two sentences buried in a news roundup on page B4. Too interesting! People might talk about it.**

P.S.: The New York Daily News, operating on an East Coast deadline, managed to generate a whole page on the busted director.

Maybe it was the cowboy part that repulsed Kaus. He can't enough of a story about blowjobs between urban male professionals.

Kaus might explain his apparent contradiction if he believes scheming foreigners don't share his clear-minded, genetic revulsion to all things gay. But Kaus himself doesn't claim that -- He imagines a universal psychologically-based preference for same-sex platonic roommates.

Perhaps Kaus's next post can address the rampant proliferation of phony same-sex pairings at companies offering benefits for gay domestic partners, such as, say, Kaus's employer, The Washington Post Company. If Kaus doesn't believe there's a tie between national origin and benefits fraud, surely he must believe that unmarried American heteros have been pairing off with same-gender friends in recent years to reap lucrative partnership benefits.

I'd give Kaus the benefit of the doubt on the immigration angle, except for the fact he frequents (or at least promotes) the bigot's bulletin board.

"History Is Like A Constantly Changing Tree"

And David Irving is like a pyromanic in a forest.

Some good reporting from the Associated Press, which isn't afraid to call David Irving what he is: a right-wing British historian:

VIENNA, Austria -- A right-wing British historian said Monday he would plead guilty to criminal charges of denying the Holocaust as his trial opened in Vienna.

David Irving, 67, told reporters he now acknowledges that the Nazis systematically slaughtered Jews during World War II. "History is like a constantly changing tree," he said as an eight-member jury and a panel of three judges prepared to hear charges that could put him behind bars for up to 10 years.

Irving has been in custody since his arrest in November on charges stemming from two speeches he gave in Austria in 1989 in which he was accused of denying the Nazis' extermination of 6 million Jews.

A verdict could come later Monday.

Irving's trial comes amid new - and fierce - debate over freedom of expression in Europe, where the printing and reprinting of unflattering cartoons of the Prophet Muhammad has triggered violent protests worldwide.

I'd oppose the criminal law on principle, but I've got no sympathy for Irving. He could've stayed clear of Austria, but chose to return to the country to spread his propaganda, knowing the consequences.

Perhaps his time in prison will allow him to finish his memoir. It did wonders for his fellow right-wing fraud, Jeffrey Archer. (Not so much for Judy Miller, though.)

Sunday, February 19, 2006

Dick Cheney IS The Beerhunter

"Go fuck yourselves, you hosers."

And, thanks to Bruce Webb, here are the Blogger-deleted comments to this post:

Eh eh. Indeed.

ahab 02.17.06 - 5:19 pm

...

Funny, Lynne actually looks like a slab of Back Bacon.

Pechorin 02.17.06 - 6:39 pm

...

On the twelfth day of Christmas

Dick Cheney gave to me

a buttload of birdshot for free

(pause)

And a beer.

Jo Fish Homepage -- 02.17.06 - 6:46 pm

...

Beerhunter.

LOL! Those fools at the Wyoming State Legislature gave the Beerhunter a standing ovation. For what, exactly?

Cybelle 02.18.06 - 12:23 am

...

Marksmanship.

doghouse riley Homepage 02.18.06 - 1:18 am

...

Kooooo Loo Koo Koo Kuu Koo Koo Koo!

CHENEY: G'day; I'm Dick Cheney, this is my friend Harry --

WHITTINGTON: Good Day, eh. Hey, that Lynn's a looker, eh. A 'good-time' girl, you know?

CHENEY: Okay; so, like, we're here -- we've got a six and whole buncha backbacon; and like I'm running the country, eh.

WHITTINGTON: I mean, like, I'm old, so it really takes some serious coal to get my Canadian Great Northern train runnin', eh. And what was that ambassador doin' with her hand down your pants, eh?

CHENEY: TAKE OFF!!! Okay. So I want to show you this new game to play; I call it 'The Beer-Hunter'. Okay; so its gotta be close to gettin' dark, eh -- and I like chug back this whole six, eh -- and you go stand over there --

WHITTINGTON: Like, over here?

CHENEY: No -- go long, eh!

WHITTINGTON: Here? Whatchoo doin' with that shotgun, Dick, eh?

CHENEY: Okay, just stand still, eh! Itz da game, eh... [Burps]

WHITTINGTON: Hey! Whataya gonna do with that gun, eh, you hoser?

CHENEY: [Burps] I'm Master Of The Universe, Eh !! I faked out everybody to invade Iraq! I'm runnin' the War On Terror; I'm like pissin' on the whole country; I'm untouchable, eh!! I'm a mighty BEER HUNTER!!! And you like think Lynn is hot, eh? TAKE OFF YOU HOSER!!!

[Shotgun discharges]

Nominal Chtulu 02.18.06 - 2:19 am

...

"I was the last one left after the nuclear holocaust, which I had caused, eh. The whole world had been destroyed, thanks to me. Fortunately, I had been offworld at the time. There wasn't much to do. All the quail and old lawyer had been destroyed. So's I spent most of my time looking for beer."

s.z. 02.18.06 - 4:19 am

...

From the same movie:

Dick Cheney: Fleshy-headed mutant. Are you friendly?

Tom DeLay: No way, eh? Radiation ... and corruption have made... me an enemy of civilization.

s.z. 02.18.06 - 4:24 am


I write letters:

Finally, the comments have returned.

Use of foul language is inappropriate under any circumstances. The Post is a family newspaper. Members of the Graham family would never resort to vulgarity to express themselves. I applaud the paper's use of profanity filters.

Cooler heads have prevailed, yet the Post still refuses to admit its fabrications.

Knowing that the Post refuses to do so forces one to question everything that is printed in the paper. The Post cannot re-earn its readers' trust if it will not admit wrongdoing.

Journalists must be completely candid when they are called on misstatements; Deborah Howell (who, admittedly is not a journalist) has not been.

I made a mistake, Howell claims. But she did not make a mistake. Her writing was deliberately false.

Mistake connotes an inadvertant or unintended error. When one writes, however, every word the deliberate product of one's mind, as is the decision to omit every word not used. Further, the decision to submit the finished product for publication is a second, deliberate act.

Because words have meanings, when one says that "Jack Abramoff gave campaign contributions to Democrats as well as Republicans" one means that Jack Abramoff gave campaign contributions to Democrats as well as Republicans. That statement simply is not true. Whether the statement is true or false, making the statement is a deliberate act, not a mistake. When the statement is false, one of two things happened. Either the writer knew the statement was false, and wanted to convey false information, or the writer didn't know the statement was true, and committed it to print without any regard (that is, reckless disregard) as to whether the statement was true or false.

Regardless of which occurred in Ms. Howell's false statements about Abramoff, causing the statement to be published was an act of dishonesty on Ms. Howell's part. Her actions were no better (and no worse) than those of Jayson Blair, Jack Kelley or Mr. Abramoff himself.

As the Post refuses to acknowledge that what Howell did was not a mistake, it cannot be trusted. Of course, Howell alone is not responsible to the paper's lack of credibility. Responsibility must be shared by Bob Woodward (who failed to tell his readers the truth about his role -- and his conflicts of interest -- in the Plame investigation) and Susan Schmidt (who tells us that Jack Abramoff was a benefactor to his religious community even though he used his religion to steal from his fellow Jews). I could go on, but those examples suffice.

Deborah Howell has been given a two-year contract as ombudsperson, and the Post must honor that contract, for both legal and moral reasons. A bad bargain is still a bargain.

Yet the Post is under no obligation to actually publish Howell's falsehoods. And when it does, it ratifies them. So the Post does allow Howell to speak for it.

I love that gag.

(Note: recreated from yesterday's Blogger-deleted post.)

Testing. Testing.

Anyone see the rightwing roundtable on Press the Meat? Prunella and Giglot vs. MoDo. What the hell was that?

We'll see how many posts this one removes.

Saturday, February 18, 2006

Roger's Word of the Day

Via Josh Marshall's link to the U.S. Attorney's Sentencing Memorandum in the Duke Cunningham case, we learn a new word:

"malversation \mal-vur-SAY-shun\, noun: Misconduct, corruption, or extortion in public office."

That would make the Bush regime the Malverstration.

p.s. --The sentencing recommendation is a fun read, although a pain to digest in the page-at-a-time format. It's also the first legal filing I've seen with color photos (of the Duke-Stir) formatted within the text of the brief. Very effective.

Update:

Bloody Hell! Blogger Just Ate My Last Post Again.

I'm going to have to figure out what's going on. Sorry. (Check comments to this post for updates.)

Friday, February 17, 2006

Worst Astroturf Ever

Slate picks an easy target in an article on the business of blogging:

The Gullible Latecomers: In the end stages of any investment mania, the clueless and the greedy flood in. You know things are really poised for a fall when people who have no management experience and feeble business plans somehow manage to raise cash for ventures. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you: Pajamas Media. Last November, the collection of right-wing blogs (with a few lefties thrown in for laughs) grandly announced the closing of a $3.5 million round of venture capital financing. Roger Simon, the screenwriter-turned-blogger who is the CEO of the enterprise, promised "to change the way people report and access news and commentary." I don't know. It looks to me like a bunch of blogs with their own logo.

Harsh? You be the judge.

Currently on the Depends Media front page:

1. A talking cracker quotes a press release:

W Ketchup announced today that it has cancelled all advertising with Google, including both search engine ads and content network ads. The company took this step to protest Google's agreement to help the Communist regime in China suppress liberty and free expression in that country.

And because they couldn't find enough change in their sofa.

2. Some other idiot quotes Fast Company quoting a third idiot:

["]Block out the noise and really pave your own road guided by what lights you up.["]

Seems like there's a big market in simple truths.

And no market for simple Simon's wingnut blog.

3. And Depends' foreign correspondent demonstrates the advantanges of having bloggers on two continents:

Writing Tips For Non-Writers

Pajamas Media in Barcelona

February 17, 2006 4:45 AM
Categories: Culture

John Scalzi has some good advice.

Read the whole thing? That is the whole thing.

Aubrey Chernick makes Dick Dasen look like a shrewd investor.

Remember this comedy classic from four months ago?

"What we are trying to do is not something that can be done on a whim [," said Roger L. Simon]. It requires a massive commitment from our team and from our platinum line up of contributors and writers. It also requires capital. We feel fortunate to have the support of our private investors."

"We are pleased to be involved with Pajamas Media in an era when the demand for new and unique channels of information grows and the convergence of blogging, news coverage and advertising begins," said Jim Koshland. "We anticipate that Pajamas Media will have a profound and positive market impact due to its outstanding team and unique business approach. We believe successful industry trends such as AOL's acquisition of Weblogs validates the emergence of blogging as an important new media market. This financing will allow the company to accelerate its growth and solidify its market position."

If only Scenes From A Mall was that funny!

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Howie the Putz convenes the Brit Hume Fan Club. And no dissent is tolerated.

I prefer David Ehrenstein's take on the infomercial.

I've only read the interview, but it's painfully obvious the thing was more choreographed than Dancing with the Stars. The whole thing.

Eternal Sunshine of The Spotless Mind

The best and brightest of the White House continue to develop selective Ronzheimer's Disease:

WASHINGTON -- When the government of Malaysia sought to repair its tarnished image in the U.S. by arranging a meeting between President Bush and its controversial prime minister in 2002, it followed the same strategy as many other well-heeled interests in Washington: It called on lobbyist Jack Abramoff for help.

It was a tall order. The then-prime minister, Mahathir Mohamad, had been chastised by the Clinton administration for repeated anti-Semitic statements and for jailing political opponents. But it was important to the Malaysians, according to a former Abramoff associate who attended meetings with the Malaysian ambassador and the lobbyist.

Abramoff contacted presidential advisor Karl Rove on at least four occasions to help arrange a meeting, the witness said.

Finally, the former associate said, Rove's office called to tell Abramoff that the Malaysian leader soon would be getting an official White House invitation.

...

Apart from the direct contacts between Rove and Abramoff, the former associate's description of the Malaysia episode was backed by another former Abramoff associate and by documents released last year by the Senate Indian Affairs Committee.

Both said Abramoff talked of his access to Rove and cited his relationship with Susan Ralston, Rove's administrative assistant. Before joining the White House staff, Ralston was an assistant to Abramoff.

One of the former associates said Abramoff referred to Ralston as his "implant" in the White House.

A White House spokeswoman, Erin Healy, said Tuesday that Rove had "no recollection" of any conversations with Abramoff regarding the Malaysian meeting.

And the e-mails, no doubt, have already been scrubbed.

Abramoff, the proud purchaser of Talmudic scholarship credentials, had no problems with Malaysia as a client:

On one occasion, Abramoff -- an orthodox Jew and a supporter of Israel -- was asked whether he was comfortable representing a country led by a man known for anti-Semitic comments.

Abramoff responded, "They pay their bills on time."

Spoken like a true Republican.

Dick/Whittington, The Panto

A new vision of the classic tale, directed by Guy Ritchie.

Co-starring Tom DeLay as King Rat. With Mary Matalin and Lucianne Goldberg as Nip and Tuck. And introducing James Guckert as Tiddles the Cat.

Certificate 15. Contains scenes of realistic violence.

Wingnut Puts Lips Around Both Barrels, Blows

John Hinderaker describes his latest fantasy:

"Almost all of us hunters have been peppered with shot at one time or another. Mostly it's inconsequential and the wind plays a big part. But I will say this: lots of us have quit a hunt when we realize that the next guy is an idiot. And this, too: knowing what I think I know about Cheney, there is no one in North America who I'd rather hunt with."
You've got to admire someone who admits he doesn't even know what he knows.

And hasn't been disbarred yet.

And I'd bet Assrocket always hunts alone.

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Multimillionaire

"No blogger is a failure who has 2 million hits" - Frank Capra

Roger Ailes, the blog, has just reached 2 million hits since I started keeping track, whenever that was. I believe it was a link from John Amato at Crooks and Liars who put the blog over the top, despite my infrequent posts of late.

Thanks to everyone who's stopped by. I'd throw you all a party if I could.

And if I had unlimited resources.

And you knew where I lived.

Saturday, February 11, 2006

Nice Shooting, Dead-Eye Dick

You know, I'm having second thoughts about whether Fat Tony Scalia's outings with the Veep are a conflict of interest.

I Was Power Hungry, And You Greased Me

I was in need of succor, and you Hoovered me.

I was the Bugchaser, and you buggered me.

Ah, those Judeo-Christian values, Abramoff/Lapin style.

"Toward Tradition, a nonprofit in Mercer Island, Wash., that promotes 'traditional Judeo Christian values' ... was used to help Abramoff funnel an alleged $50,000 bribe of an aide to DeLay."

The L.A. Times article, quoted above, is a good antidote to the myth, propogated by Steno Sue Schmidt and others, that Bush's crony was "a generous patron in his Orthodox Jewish community...."

And here's an article on Jackoff that focuses on the fundamentals -- the three Rs. Namely: Representatives Steven LaTourette (R-Ohio), Don Young (R-Alaska) and Shelly Moore Capito (R-W.Va). Talk about the lack of bipartisianship in the capital.

Steele Pelted Radials, The Sequel

Pat Roberton's Christian Broadcasting Network bears false witness once more, this time concerning Maryland Lt. Gov. Michael Steele:

Some Maryland Democrats have thrown Oreo cookies at him, accusing him of being black on the outside but white on the inside.

Sorry, never happened.

Meanwhile, Steele attempted to pander to the board of the Baltimore Jewish Council by comparing those who support embryonic stem-cell research to Nazi scientists.

The board immediately pelted him with hamantashen.

Thursday, February 09, 2006

Bush Lied

Iraq

Katrina

Abramoff

Lucky us. We hit the trifecta.

Tell me again why anyone should believe Bush about his illegal wiretapping.

I apologize again for my extended absence. It's entirely "the result of [my] preoccupation with many serious matters of national security" at this time.

Perhaps if I was fucking doing my job instead of engaged in breakfast entanglements with Judith Miller and Pumpkinhead Russert and trying to fuck over the subject of my boss's latest hardon that might be a credible explanation.

Oh well.

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Truth Is Only A Theory

This little prick has a brilliant career ahead of himself, as a right-wing blogger. Or Attorney General:

George C. Deutsch, the young presidential appointee at NASA who told public affairs workers to limit reporters' access to a top climate scientist and told a Web designer to add the word "theory" at every mention of the Big Bang, resigned yesterday, agency officials said.

Mr. Deutsch's resignation came on the same day that officials at Texas A&M University confirmed that he did not graduate from there, as his résumé on file at the agency asserted.

Officials at NASA headquarters declined to discuss the reason for the resignation.

"Under NASA policy, it is inappropriate to discuss personnel matters," said Dean Acosta, the deputy assistant administrator for public affairs and Mr. Deutsch's boss.

The resignation came as the National Aeronautics and Space Administration was preparing to review its policies for communicating science to the public. The review was ordered Friday by Michael D. Griffin, the NASA administrator, after a week in which many agency scientists and midlevel public affairs officials described to The New York Times instances in which they said political pressure was applied to limit or flavor discussions of topics uncomfortable to the Bush administration, particularly global warming.

"As we have stated in the past, NASA is in the process of revising our public affairs policies across the agency to ensure our commitment to open and full communications," the statement from Mr. Acosta said.

The statement said the resignation of Mr. Deutsch was "a separate matter."

Mr. Deutsch, 24, was offered a job as a writer and editor in NASA's public affairs office in Washington last year after working on President Bush's re-election campaign and inaugural committee, according to his resume. No one has disputed those parts of the document.

Of course not. And he was well-qualified for those positions.

'Twas a blogger who nailed the prick.

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Phyllis Schlafly: Marriage = Consent to Rape

No, it's not a joke.

A man's life has been sacrificed, and three children have been denied their father by malicious feminists who have lobbied for laws that punish spousal rape just like stranger rape and deny a man the right to cross-examine his accuser. They have created a judicial system where the woman must always be believed even though she has no evidence, one in which the man is always guilty.

Yes, the testimony of a woman is not evidence. And rape is not rape. And protecting rape victims equally is malice.

I know nothing about the merits of the particularly case Schlafly discusses, but I question how much Schafly knows herself. Of Mr. Hetherington's trial, Schlafly writes:

Weiss was running for a judgeship. Observers sized up his prejudicial statements as grandstanding for support from feminists.

The National Coalition of Free Men writes:

The criminal court docket shows that an evidentiary hearing was scheduled for 7/29/86, but it was not held or rescheduled. An Assistant Prosecutor tried the case, but the county prosecutor who was running for State Supreme Court addressed the court on two occasions: The bond hearing and the sentencing. The implications are strong that he was "grandstanding" for the feminist vote. The judge, too, may have been looking for political favor with the feminist vote.

Oh, those observers.

Schlafly:

The rape charge was prosecuted simultaneously with the custody case, and the divorce court had frozen all Hetherington's assets so he had no money to hire a lawyer or make bond. Nevertheless, the criminal court ruled that he was not indigent and refused to provide him with a lawyer.

The NCFM:

MOTIVE FOR THE CHARGE - The trial took place during a bitter divorce and custody dispute. It was expected that Will would win custody, because his wife had abandoned the family for more than two months.

* THERE ARE MANY IMPROPRIETIES SURROUNDING THIS CASE: Wil had to defend himself in criminal court at the same time that his divorce was proceeding. The divorce court froze Wil's assets after his CSC arrest. At the same time the criminal court refused to acknowledge that Wil did not have the use of those assets. Therefore, the criminal court refused to appoint a public defender. The way Wil obtained legal counsel was based on a "promise" to pay.

Schlafly:

Hetherington has always maintained his innocence. It was a he-said-she-said case during a custody battle; he said it was consensual sex, she said it was rape.

The NCFM:

His wife claimed that he had raped her. The case was a matter of "he said/she said". Wil has been in prison, now, for more than 18 years. During all of that time he has consistently maintained his innocence.

Perhaps Schafly did independent research. Schlafly's column also contains factual assertions I don't see on the NCFM page. (But there are also similarities to this page ["The prosecuting attorney used the case to 'grandstand' to the feminist vote. He was running for state supreme court (in 1985 this was Robert Weiss)"].)

Clearly, though, Schlafly and the NCFM have the same talking points -- and the same hatred of "feminists." And they both fantasize about a Government War on Men.

It's amusing to see Schafly make all the arguments about the criminal justice system that are usually ridiculed by purported law-and-order types -- unless it's a Republican on trial. Or it would be if Schlafly's arguments weren't a transparent excuse to pen another column displaying her contempt for women.

Depends Media Dump

Cub reporter Paul Tossingoff is gathering accolades for finding a career to fall back, in case he throws out his back and isn't able to carry Bob Strauss's bags any longer.

The only thing he needs now is a reporter name to help him butch up a little. You know, like Jeff Gannon. I'd suggest Forrest Gump.

My professional advice to Paulie Smallnuts: Watch and learn how it's done.

Sunday, February 05, 2006

I Support Cheese Danish

p.s. to Claire: e-mail me, dinner's on me.