They weren't booing. They were yelling "Toup!"

Why Laura was so happy to sweep the porch.

Bob Somerby incomparably kicks Kellyanne, Tucker and Billy to the curb. Sweet.

Homophobia Five-0: Who's running on an anti-gay platform in Hawai'i? You make the call.

Extra credit: How about California? You make the call. (via MWO).

Not only is Our Man In Islamisbad hallucinating, now he wants the New York Times to investigate his hallucinations too.

In bashing the Times' sniper coverage, Sully says: "A senior police official has already told the Washington Post that the race of the men was a factor in letting them go."

As explained below, this is pure fiction. The article Sully contains no such quote. (Also note that Sully has expanded his lie: The Washington Post article refers to Muhammad only, not "the men." When you're just making shit up, I guess it's in for a penny, in for a pound.)

But now Sully criticizes the NYT for failing to "at least ... investigate[] or even mention[]" the non-existent quote. It's hard to blame the Times for failing to follow up on something which exists only in fevered delusions of one man's tiny mind.

Arkansas Project, Part Deux?

Criticized for using state funds and personnel for personal purposes and her own, miserably-failing campaign to be Secretary of Sfate, Arkansas First Lady Janet Huckabee lashed back back at her critics:

"I'd be lying if I said it didn't bother me," she said in an interview. "If it wasn't for the grace of God, I'd have shot a few people already."

"Jesus wasn't liked, either," she added. "And Jesus was mistreated, and called names."

One can't help but wonder why those chinless idiots who read (and wrote for) the American Spectator in the 90s aren't up in arms about the abuses of office by Governor Mike Huckabee and his wife: using state police as chauffeurs, accepting lavish gifts from political appointees, participating in illegal meetings to release well-connected rapists from prison, blocking ethics investigations, issuing death threats. You know, all the things folks used to accuse Governor and Mrs. Clinton of whenever Richard Scaife paid them enough money.

Just imagine the gnashing of teeth and the soiling of underpants at Freakrepublic if Senator Clinton had wished her critics dead or compared herself of the Son of God.

Let's all pray that Jimmie Lou Fisher will return Honor and Dignity to the Arkansas State House.

Our Man In Islamisbad Writes:

Not one of his victims was a Muslim. Coincidence? Somehow I think not.

Mo Do Ho Pho Watch

Liberal homophobe Maureen Dowd is at it again, calling Our President and his Veep "girly-boys." Wait, it's President Carter and Vice President Mondale. Never mind.

But wait, again. MoDo also says that "Karl Rove and W. obsess over how to emanate muscularity."

Now I'm just confused.

Mike Kelly: Chickenshit or Chicken Salad?

Presidential Apologist Kelly writes:

The generally accepted definition of the term, which dates at least to 1988, describes 'chicken hawks' as public persons, generally male, who advocate war but who declined a significant opportunity to serve in uniform during wartime.

"Chicken hawk" is interesting as an insult because it is such a pure example of reactionary thinking or, rather, the substitution of reaction for thinking. It is the sort of thing you say when you need to stop the argument in its tracks because you simply can't bear to address its realities. Other obvious examples of the type might include "my country right or wrong" and "I don't know much about art, but I know what I like." ...

So it is with "chicken hawk." Its power lies in the simplicity that comes with being completely wrong. The central implication here is that only men who have professionally endured war have the moral standing and the experiential authority to advocate war. That is, in this country at least, a radical and ahistorical view. The Founders, who knew quite well the dangers of a military class supreme, were clear in their conviction that the judgment of professional warmakers must be subordinated to the command of ignorant amateurs -- civilian leaders who were in turn subordinated to the command of civilian voters. Such has given us the leadership in war of such notable "chicken hawks" as Abraham Lincoln and Franklin Delano Roosevelt.

Time constraints preclude the full appropriate response to this chickenshit (the author, and the article). The most obvious flaw, however, is the re-definition of usage to suit Kelly's purposes. The term "chickenhawk" does not assert that those without military experience cannot or should not advocate war; rather, it simply asserts that a particular advocate of war lacks the moral standing to make the case. When a warmonger avoids combat during wartime through paternal string-pulling or because he has "other priorities," he lacks the authority to make the case that there is a moral obligation to wage war. The war a chickenhawk advocates may be right or wrong, but the chickenhawk has already demonstrated, by his actions, his belief that war is not a moral obligation.

The chickenhawk can still argue other reasons to wage war (economic benefits for his cronies, the need to win mid-term elections, etc.). He can even argue the moral case for the war. But he can't avoid the consequences of being called on his hypocrisy.

More about the differences between Kelly and Lincoln, and why F.D.R. and Lincoln aren't chickenhawks, later.

Our Man In Islamisbad Writes:

"Somehow I knew this guy is a Muslim too. Really. The mainstream media doesn't want you to know."

Just How Stupid Are The Dildoheads?

Listen to the head dildo himself: " I'm going to tell you a little secret: Matt Drudge's website is the source for more newsrooms in this country, print and broadcast, than any of them will ever admit. It gets millions and millions of hits � and if you read it, you'll find that the "breaking" news the so-called real media publishes, looks as stale as the month-old publications in your dentist's office.... Now, more often than not, the giants of media who think that they, and they alone, should decide what news is fit to print, are told what's news by Drudge himself."

Now anyone idiot with a computer, even one who listens to Rush, can go to Drudge's site and see that there's not a single sentence of original content over there. Zip. If it wasn't for links to other sites, the screen would be whiter than Ann Coulter's fantasy America. All the "breaking news" that Drudge publishes has already been published in the real media. Drudge hasn't broken any news this century.

Not to mention the fact that Rush's reasoning flies completely in the face of the Bias-b.s. he peddles to the afflicted.

Even Rush's slack-jawed fans couldn't swallow this one. Either Drudge is paying Rush for the plug, or he's got some extremely nasty photos of Rush ready to download.

The First Selection Of The Roger Ailes Book Club

"They would be called upon to lead a nation in one of its darkest hours -- but were they up to the task? He had been the wild, hard-drinking scion of one of America's premier political families. She was the school librarian with a warm smile and a tragic secret of her own. Yet after the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001, they rose to the challenge: He became the embodiment of America's fighting spirit and she assumed the role of "First Comforter" with effortless grace. Still, the true nature of their relationship has remained a mystery.

"Until now.... Christopher Andersen draws on important sources -- many speaking here for the first time -- to paint a vivid, sometimes startling, often inspiring portrait of America's First Couple. Among the intriguing insights and stunning revelations: Important new information about 9/11 and its aftermath -- including a gripping moment-by-moment account of how the President and First Lady coped as the horrific drama unfolded.The true extent of George W.'s drinking problem, the strains it put on his marriage, and the ultimatum that changed his life -- and the course of history.Their heartbreaking battle against infertility and how close Laura came to dying in childbirth.The early tragedies that shaped them, including the car crash caused by a teenage Laura that took the life of a former boyfriend -- and changed her life forever. Laura's surprising behind-the-scenes influence on U.S. policy -- foreign and domestic.The pressures of raising headstrong twin daughters in the glare of the media -- and how 9/11 has brought the Bushes and their children closer together than ever before.

"George and Laura is a compelling look at their unique partnership, and the courage, grace, and humor that defines it. It is a stirring wartime saga of triumph and tragedy and, above all, a uniquely American love story."

Read it on the crapper, purge, and then e-mail us your questions to Barbara Cartland, er, Christoper Anderson.

As David Horowitz would say:

20,000 Communists!

Which illustrates the difference between a righteous man and a prick.

As it is now our solemn moral obligation to denounce racist local shock-jocks that we've never heard of, let me denounce this guy.

There, I feel much better. Better than you, that is.

p.s. Don't hold your breath waiting for Tim Russert to grill Norm Coleman on this one.

Damn, I'm Good

"Fox News is asking the United Nations for permission to send reporters and camera crews along if U.N. weapons inspectors return to Iraq....'Some television outlet ought to volunteer to eat the cost of showing everything worldwide,' says Fox News Chairman Roger Ailes. 'Why not let the world in on what's going on? . . . If the American people can see the U.N. live and working, I don't see it hurting the U.N.'"

I just hope like hell no one tries this stunt with the Florida election.

Is Hitch enlisting in the R.A.F., or has he just picked up the affectations of royalty?

Among Friends (Fifth In A Series)

Non-Celibate, Non-Bigoted Washington Times Columnist Thomas Sowell Welcomes His New Colleague: "Even as regards the pedophile priests, the media shy away from the plain fact that these cases are primarily cases of homosexual abuse of children. Fear of the homosexual lobby always seems to immobilize our crusading journalists, despite their brave talk about 'the public's right to know' in other contexts. That same fear also immunizes the North American Man/Boy Love Association from criticism. [Para.] The blaming of celibacy in the priesthood for the sexual exploitation of children has been a red herring. Most of these pedophile priests did not go after females. They wanted boys."

Bonus Display of Tolerance: "When gay activists have come into schools to propagandize children, in the name of 'AIDS education' or 'diversity,' and left cards with addresses of local homosexual hangouts, supposedly 'responsible' officials have been more concerned with keeping these facts from the children's parents than with protecting the children themselves."

The Rush Limbaugh Axis

Kevin Phillips coins the phrase.

Nominations, anyone?

Daylight Savings Time, One World Government Arrive Without Fanfare

"'Walter Mondale chaired a commission that was for the privatization of Social Security worldwide....,' former House speaker Newt Gingrich (R-Ga.) said on NBC's 'Meet the Press.'" (Emphasis added.)

In other news, the Heritage Foundation has declared intellectual bankruptcy.

David Horowitz is on a mission. He's taking out ads in college newspapers to warn at-risk youth about the subversive dangers of Belafonte-ism. But one man can only do so much, and, anyway, he came up with the idea, so why should he have to pay for it too?

"But to place this ad, we need to raise the $58,000.00 media budget in less than ONE WEEK. I need your help. Now. Please help out with a contribution of $500, $250, $100 or $25."

I urge all Horowitz supporters to "give 'til it hurts" and then give even more. If only one Berkeley sophomore is stopped before he or she illegally downloads cuts from Calypso, then there is hope for the future. And, if this campaign is successful, Horowitz will be able to warn our kids about other self-hating African-American agitators: Paul Robeson, Frederick Douglass, Shari Belafonte-Harper and Satan.