Saturday, November 29, 2014

Jesus Loves Me, Fuck You Hos

Last week, from GOP mouthpiece Elizabeth Lauten:

This week, Lauten decided to up her mentions by taking some teenagers to task for not loving pink, green and pearls. That casual shit don't fly in the Junior League and the D.A.R, you no class b****es.

Ms. Lauten, who is in her mid-30s, formerly worked for the Godly Joe Walsh (R-IL), and John McCain, under whose tutelage she perfected her technique. She now runs a p.r. shop called Audeamus (pronunced "Adumbass" in a Southern accent) and works for some peckerwood Congressman from Tennessee. But she's learned from her recent experience -- specifically, she learned to hide behind God's skirts and make her insults available on a "friends only" basis.

Update (12/1):  Lauten is out of her job, while John McCain remains employed.  FOX News Channel would have scooped her up already, but for the fact she fails (the other) Ailes' first test for a female job applicant. 

Update II (12/1):  Bonus fun from the Smoking Gun"Lauten, pictured above, was arrested in December 2000 for misdemeanor larceny, according to court records. Lauten, then 17, was collared for stealing from a Belk department store in her North Carolina hometown. Because Lauten was a first-time offender, her case was handled via the District Court’s deferred prosecution program, which resulted in the charge’s eventual dismissal after the future scold stayed out of trouble for a prescribed period."

Wingnut! Don't shoot!


roy edroso said...

But wait, Roger, according to Noah Rothman this is a witch hunt! Calling Obama's kids bar skanks may be "gauche," and "criticizing children for their parents’ actions is almost always unwarranted" (?), but people made fun of the Palin girls, who were just doing what comes natcherly (getting knocked up and/or and in street brawls) while the Obama girls were looking bored. Also black.

Montag said...

Ah, well, in a better world, this woman would have to go back to shoplifting to support herself, but, I'm betting that there are even loonier Tea Party congress critters than Fincher that will hire her, if only because she's reflexively mean and stupid. In the New Insane Congress, those are admirable qualities, to be sure.