The Triumph of Hope Over Experience

An intrepid peckerwood reports from CPAC, where the spotted youth have hope for change:

Being the good, intrepid blogger, I ran across the street to a CVS to buy a notepad

Interruption: Wouldn't a good, intrepid blogger have some sort of electronic device with which to record his precious thoughts?

having left mine in my office back in Macon, GA. There in line were a half dozen young men, each with CPAC credentials around their necks and each buying condoms.

(Pretending that this actually happened) And Oly isn't buying their excuse that they were going to waterbomb Occupy D.C.

That is part of life on the college circuit. Young men, regardless of political persuasion or ideology, are intent on having sex, being boys, getting drunk — doing what young men in college often do. All to [sic] often there are also a few young ladies willing to shame their parents if their parents only knew.

True, there is nothing more shameful than giving a handjob to a YAFer. But if they rinse their hands thoroughly, there's no reason the parents should know.

Here comes Swen's summation:

I am not even sure that there is a solution to the problem. But we should not think it is anything but a problem. It is not every young man, but there are many. They risk dragging the whole affair down to some bawdy, rowdy distraction. They risk embarrassing themselves and the conservative movement. They risk the perception premised on their own actions that conservative men of a certain age think that good manners and decorum around women of the same age is unneeded or unwanted.

This is not to say CPAC cannot and should not be fun. This is not to say that CPAC cannot and should not be a party. But it is to say that I hope the college groups bussing in students next year, the out of college set there to network, and CPAC itself encourage behavior we all too often don’t talk about anymore in our society — the behavior of gentlemen. Eat, drink, smoke, be merry, but be chivalrous too.

They're buying the condoms, Thor. How much more chivalry can you expect from these wingnut wankers?

There really is, regardless of your age, no need to play the cad at CPAC to score points with conservative ladies.

Points? You don't buy rubbers hoping to score points.

Conservatives should, first and foremost, want to conserve the basics and good behavior should remain a basic characteristic of the conservative movement. As conservatives, we believe in self-government. With that belief comes the duty of personal responsibility. We should accept that duty as the opportunity to do what is right, not as license to behave like fools.

So, even though Sven knows "young men, regardless of political persuasion or ideology, are intent on having sex," and everyone else, having at least 50 i.q. points on Sven, knows it too, these conservalads should just knock it off. Or, more specifically, rub it out, while watching porn on Rupert Murdoch's Spectravision in the semi-privacy of their shared hotel rooms.

In summary, join Erick Erickson's Junior Anti-Sex League today. If Erick's not getting any, neither are you.