Shiver Me Timbers and Blow Me, Clown

Syphilis Gonorrhea Hanson has some "thoughts" about pirates:

Piracy may or may not be a matter of American national security, but the American people will not for long stand the notion that a captive brave American ship captain risks his life to escape, while formidable American naval power either cannot or will not punish the miscreants.

More Americans have been killed this month by paranoid anti-Obama teabaggers wearing body armor than have been killed by pirates in the last 100 years.

While Hanson's preferred solution, involving a big 'splosion and 300 naked, glistening swabbies, might arouse Hanson's interest for a few minutes, the American people might prefer a plan which didn't involve killing the brave American ship captain for Hanson's vicarious jollies.

V.D. also notes that, since 1989, his fellow academics have been soft on piracy. Perhaps the eggheads are big Bobby Bonilla fans.

Update: Is this butch enough for ya, Herpes?