Joe's For Jesus

If you have a loved one who died in Iraq or Afghanistan, he or she just didn't love Jesus enough, says Joe "the Plumber" Wurzelbacher. The illiquid plumber couldn't cut it in crapper repair, so he's got a new gig pestering Israelis for Depends Media.

"I get to go over there and let their 'Average Joes' share their story, what they think, how they feel, especially with world opinion, maybe get a real story out there," [Wurzelbacher] said.

"If given the opportunity to do some good however minute it may be, or could be something really good, you gotta take that chance. You have to do it," he added, heroically.

Is he scared that one of the Hamas rockets might have his name on it? Not really. After all, as he explained, he's a Christian so God will keep him safe.

"Being a Christian I'm pretty well protected by God I believe," he said.

JtP can convert a few of Israeli Joes to Christianity while he's on assignment, if only to save their lives. And when he gets back, he can baptize Roger L. Simon.