Lies My Teacher Told Me

An e-mail exchange between Jack Abramoff and wingnut Rabbi Daniel Lapin, starting with Abramoff:

I have been nominated for membership in the Cosmos Club, which is a very distinguished club in Washington, DC, comprised of Nobel Prize winners, etc. Problem for me is that most prospective members have received awards and I have received none. I was wondering if you thought it possible that I could put that I have received an award from Toward Tradition with a sufficiently academic title, perhaps something like Scholar of Talmudic Studies?... Indeed, it would be even better if it were possible that I received these in years past, if you know what I mean. Anyway, I think you see what I am trying to finagle here!

Indeed he did. "Mazel tov, the Cosmos Club is a big deal," Lapin replied. A few days, later the rabbi wrote again:

'Let's organize your many prestigous awards so they're ready to 'hang on the wall.'... I just need to know what needs to be produced. Letters? Plaques? Neither?

"Probably just a few clever titles of awards, dates and that's it," Abramoff replied.

More here.

Would it surprise you that Lapin is a mentor of that self-professed pillar of morality, Michael Medved? Me neither.

Lapin and his family relocated to Washington State in 1991, where he hosts a nationally syndicated weekly radio show.... Michael Medved also moved to Washington State around the same time as Lapin and hosts his own syndicated talk radio show based out of the same AM station in Seattle. Both Medved and Lapin promote conservative political principles, inter-mixed with traditional religious observance. Lapin was one of the Jewish voices in support of Mel Gibson's movie The Passion of the Christ, and was a strong supporter of Terri Schiavo's parents efforts to keep their daughter alive. He has declared that the Anti-Defamation League and its allies were "dangerous organizations, organizations that are driving a wedge between American Jews and Christians." ... Lapin believes the United States of America is the most Jewish-friendly state in history and that it is better for Jews to promote shared Judeo-Christian values with the majority. Lapin also rejects the idea that the Jewish left (which can be secular or even anti-religious) represents Judaism.

In fact, Medved sits on the Board of Directors of Toward Tradition, along with Jack Abramoff. He's just too modest to mention it nowdays, I'm sure.

This story should make Medved flip his toupee again, like when he called Hans Reimer a liar with no basis for doing so. It may also make him grimace more than usual.

I'm sure the righteous Medved will call for Lapin to be fired from his radio gig -- and turned out of Toward Tradition -- for fabricating unearned awards and honors.

There's more fun to be had at the Toward Tradition site, where you can buy the "Ten Commandments for Making Money" (Commandment No. 1: Thou shalt use the phone rather than e-mail when communicating with sleazebag lobbyists, dumbass) and read about the "Ethical Capitalism Project." You can also e-mail a question "you'd like to hear answered on Rabbi Lapin's radio or TV program," such as "how much for a 1992 degree in Talmudic Ethics, 9 by 12, and suitable for framing?"