Oh Kenny Boy, the Feds, the Feds are calling
Put on the cuffs, you're goin' for a ride
The summer's come, the grand jury is indicting
'Tis you, 'tis you must go and stay inside.

Once you were my favorite Pioneer, oh Kenny
I hired Tommy White, I rolled upon your dirty dough
You were my fav'rite on Dick's Energy Task Force
Oh Kenny boy, oh Kenny boy, I loved you so.

But if you call, I must pretend not to know you
You are dead; your cash is no longer good to me
That White House, where I do all my lyin'
Is no longer ope' for you to bide a wee

And I shall hear, if thou shalt implicate me
If you cross me, prison hell on earth shall be
If you'll not take the Fifth Amendment
And keep your trap shut, so that I can pardon thee.

You'll have no peace on earth, Lay-Boy, if you screw me.