Jurisprudence By The Numbers

TBogg reports that Theordore "Ted" Olson, Esq. informed the U.S. Supreme Court that he performed an internet search of the phrase "free porn" on his home computer and got more than 6 million hits. "That's proof, Solicitor General Theodore Olson told the Supreme Court on Tuesday, of the need for a law protecting children from a tide of online smut."

A search of "free speech" also got more than 6 million hits, so kiss the First Amendment goodbye.

Also subject to censorship under the Olson regime:

free Jesus -- 6,170,000

free Iraq -- 6,810,000

free association -- 6,920,000

free assembly -- 7,070,000

Free Republic -- 7,140,000 (they're more popular than Jesus)

free arms -- 7,570,000

free health care -- 8,900,000

free food -- 11,700,000

free money -- 14,600,000

All of the above pose an obvious danger to the nation, and must be banned ... for the children!

Not only was Ted paid by you and me to search for porn at home, he's now got a defense if the Ashcroft Justice Department ever tries to send him to prison for cybering with Ann Coulter.